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(Molly) **He is stood at the window in Verity's morning room. In his arms, a sleeping baby with a sweet face and dark red hair. Her eyes when she's awake are reassuringly the same blue green as his, as blue green as the Sudlache he glares at. He's come to hate these large bodies of water with their appealing, mysterious horizons despite his childhood fascination.
(Molly) "I don't mean to overstep,  dear boy, but I want to talk to you about Molly". A quick glance shows his mother's deep concern,  and barely veiled disappointment. He groans inwardly, this lecture familiar and unwelcome. On the couch, a sandy haired two year old sleeps, sucking his thumb.
(Molly) "She should be here with her children, not gallivanting on that damned ship!" He winces slightly. His mother never used profanities. "It's not that simple, Mother… Molly has a wanderlust, and July and August are such challenging months for her…" But even he is growing sick of these platitudes he's been giving for the last decade.
(Molly) "Dear Boy, it is long past time that Molly moves on from her late husband's death. She is your wife now, and despite having not wanted children, she now has some. Madchen should not be with a wet nurse so soon, and nor should Ehren and Christopher have been"
(Molly) He sighs. What else can he do? He agrees with Verity. He hates that she leaves like this each year, and that her devotion to her first husband is so much that she abandons her second and their children to retrace her steps with him for weeks at sea.
(Molly) But the year she could not go when she was heavily pregnant, she was distraught beyond measure, and he feared for her life. And the nightmares… He shudders, almost waking the baby.
(Molly) "She and her first husband had far too much freedom, and you are giving her the same, hoping to live up to him. I'm sorry dear boy, I know how deeply you love her, but… does she love you as much?"
(Molly) "Of course she does, Mother" His words sound hollow. He's wondered this too many times.  She loved her late husband as much as he himself loves her he has no doubt of that.
(Molly) "I don't wish to be indelicate, Morgan, but your Father and I think you are in need of companionship. There is a girl in the village… she is a seamstress. She's very pretty and gentle… and steady. Perhaps we could make introductions, and see what develops?"
(Molly) He frowns "You and Father want me to take a mistress?"
(Molly) "We want you to not be lonely, dear boy. Dietlinde is a sweet girl. She will be good with the children too. And Molly won't mind. No doubt she has company on these voyages".
(Molly) He scowls. No-one had ever voiced this secret fear of his, the reason he never came inside her after these trips until she had bled. It wasn't impossible to believe.
(Molly) If she could still love and adore bloody Seb and yet go to bed with Morgan when she was actually home, nothing would stop her taking a lover behind Morgan's back, surely? He feels jealous, and resentful. More than that, he feels abandoned and insignificant.
(Molly) Maybe it was time he put his own needs first, rather than having to deal with his sexual frustration himself for months on end.
(Molly) Maybe it was time Molly truly understood the damage of her actions when she left him to sail off into the sunset with her memories of her perfect Sebastian. Maybe if she knew he would share his time with someone who actually valued his attention completely...
(Molly) "Make the arrangements, I'll meet…" He tries to recall the name "... Dietlinde, as you wish". He feels a gentle pressure on his arm as the baby stirs, and in reality he wakes up.
* @Morgan opens his eyes, frowning
(Molly) He scowls. No-one had ever voiced this secret fear of his, the reason he never came inside her after these trips until she had bled. It wasn't impossible to believe.
(Molly) If she could still love and adore bloody Seb and yet go to bed with Morgan when she was actually home, nothing would stop her taking a lover behind Morgan's back, surely? He feels jealous, and resentful. More than that, he feels abandoned and insignificant.
(Molly) Maybe it was time he put his own needs first, rather than having to deal with his sexual frustration himself for months on end.
(Molly) Maybe it was time Molly truly understood the damage of her actions when she left him to sail off into the sunset with her memories of her perfect Sebastian. Maybe if she knew he would share his time with someone who actually valued his attention completely...
(Molly) "Make the arrangements, I'll meet…" He tries to recall the name "... Dietlinde, as you wish". He feels a gentle pressure on his arm as the baby stirs, and in reality he wakes up.
* Molly is making coffee at the desk with her back to him, just in a thin shift and hair in one long braid
* @Morgan sits up, shuffling into a comfortable position 
(Molly) *The cat jumps down from the crook of his arm*
* Molly turns at his movement
(Molly) I was going to leave you longer
* @Morgan scowls
* Molly frowns
(Molly) Its only quarter after eleven. I didn't realise you wished to be woken early, I'm sorry
(@Morgan) Its not that
* Molly studies his face for signs of his feelings
(Molly) What's the matter, liebling?
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-NickServ- Welcome to Blitzed IRC Network, MollyK! Here on Blitzed IRC Network, we provide services to enable the registration of nicknames and channels! For details, type /msg NickServ help and /msg ChanServ help.
(MollyK) Test
(@Morgan) yep
(MollyK) [14:58] (Molly) What's the matter, liebling?
(@Morgan) bad dreams
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* MollyK looks sad
(MollyK) How can I help?
* @Morgan shrugs
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(Molly) I could sit with you? Or give you coffee?
(@Morgan) Coffee please. I dreamed you'd lost Seb and we'd married but you spent months sailing the same route he did every year
* Molly gets his coffee, handing it to him
(Molly) I'd been married but you hadn't?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) My mother and father wanted me to take a mistress, as no doubt you had lovers...
(Molly) Oh liebling, this sounds awful for you
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I wonder if thats how you feel
* Molly comes to sit beside him with her own coffee
(Molly) What do you mean?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) its hard to explain
* Molly nods, sipping her coffee
(Molly) Was I running his business or something?
(@Morgan) No, nothing like that
(Molly) Why was I sailing the same route?
(@Morgan) In his memory I suppose... the two of you were always gallivanting about
* Molly nods a little
(Molly) So he might be a sailor, as well as a navy man?
* @Morgan frowns
(@Morgan) I suppose so... the two are normally linked
* Molly tilts her head "Your _Father_ wanted you to have a mistress?! That's... unlike him!"
(@Morgan) indeed... 
(Molly) You must have been lonely
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) I'm sorry
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) That is how you feel?
* Molly looks confused
(Molly) I'm not lonely
(@Morgan) I meant like I abandon you, that you are second to someone else
* Molly sips her coffee, mulling this over
(Molly) No... its not always easy, but I do not feel abandoned, and I do know how deeply you love me
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) good
* Molly watches him
(Molly) You hae worried about this?
(Molly) Have*
(@Morgan) Not until I had that dream
(@Morgan) Not since we made so much progress
* Molly sips her coffee
(Molly) You felt second best in the dream?
* @Morgan nods
* Molly nods sadly
(Molly) That must have been dreadful for you
(@Morgan) It wasn't pleasantr
(Molly) Do you think that was just jealousy, or an alternate path where I was clearly not a good person?
(@Morgan) I don't know... or maybe it was showing me how you felt...
(Molly) At the very least if it was a path it is one we have luckily avoided!
* @Morgan nods
* Molly takes his spare hand, kissing his knuckles
(Molly) And how do you feel now?
* @Morgan shrugs
(Molly) Do you wish to ask Sorgi to cover your watch?
(@Morgan) No, I'll do it
(Molly) You are sure? I'm not sure I could be apart from you had I had such a dream
(@Morgan) I'll manage
* Molly smiles gently
(Molly) I know, you're strong and resilient and tough, and you really don't need me fussing over you
* @Morgan shrugs
(Molly) You are though. You're the most resilient person I know. You seem to need so little from any of us.
(@Morgan) You're wrong
* Molly frowns a little
(Molly) Howso?
(@Morgan) I need a great deal from you
(Molly) You do? Like what?
(@Morgan) All manner fo things
* Molly sips her coffee,  watching him over the rim
(Molly) You do not want to say?
(@Morgan) Not right now
* Molly nods slowly
(Molly) Has the dream made you displeased with me somehow?
(@Morgan) Residually, perhaps. It'll pass.
* Molly nods
(Molly) But only because of the dream, not something I have actually done?
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) Alright my love, I will retire then and leave you to your watch. There's a flask and a blanket keeping warm in the galley for you
(@Morgan) Thank you blossom
* Molly kisses his hand again before rising with her coffee
(Molly) I'll see you when you are done?
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) **He finishes his coffee, gathers up Captain Ulysses and the things she's arranged, and gets to work. Half an hour into his watch, he's up in the chilly nest with his flask of coffee and feline scarf when he hears someone climbing up*
* @Morgan leans over the rail, looking down
(Molly) *HH stops in the ropes as high as he can get* Bloody cold up 'ere.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) you need a neckwarmer
* @Morgan points at the cat
** You're now known as HH
(HH) Then I'd be cold, mis'r'ble and sneezing
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) it's not so bad once you get used to it
(HH) A warm bed would be better
(@Morgan) tough to fit one up 'ere
* HH sounds serious
(HH) I've fucked up
(@Morgan) why?
(HH) *he sighs* I've 'ad an argument with my wife, now she's gone to sleep in the bed an' I can't.
(@Morgan) what about?
(HH) I thought she was jokin' when she asked how many women I'd bedded
(@Morgan) oh dear
(HH) I jokingly said "None of 'em were in a bed, does tha' still count?". But it sounded like she was bein' playful, y'know?
* @Morgan sighs
(@Morgan) I'm surprised at you
(HH) Oh god dont you start too
(@Morgan) You're a smart man, I'm surprised you didn't see that coming... women never joke about things like that
(@Morgan) and even if they did, the answer you give is something like none of them could hold a candle to you
* HH groans
(HH) Damn. It gets worse too
(@Morgan) oh?
(HH) I got defensive, she got angry, I turned th' subject to her an' Heinrich…
* @Morgan rubs his forehead
(@Morgan) ah
(HH) That was my second mistake. Now I'm pissed off about him, she's pissed off about some trifling flings that didn't go much further than she did with him, and we're not talkin'.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) What are you going to do about it?
(HH) Get advice fr'm a man who 'as been married twice. You coulda warned me about this part of married life!
(HH) **The cat purrs in his ear
* @Morgan shrugs
(HH) We've never 'ad an argument b'fore.
(@Morgan) Its simple. Apologise
(HH) But she's in the wrong as well. She loved Heinrich, she'd 'av married 'im
(@Morgan) so?
(HH) So... that's worse, isn't it.
* @Morgan watches him a moment
(@Morgan) so?
(HH) Well, she's gettin' jealous 'cos of other girls, even though she was in love with him, and I'm supposed to just not be
(@Morgan) You realise she loves you more than she ever did him, yes?
(HH) I know she didn't go back to him when she 'ad the chance, but I still feel jealous that she felt it at all
* @Morgan nods
(HH) I'm still mad, but I also don't feel good tha' I've hurt her too. I want to say sorry, but I also want her to see tha' I'm right.
(@Morgan) Be honest, HeinzHarold, does it matter? Her being upset about your previous conquests is just as valid a reason as yours to be upset, but where does belabouring any of that get you?
* HH sighs
(HH) I dunno. I hate him for it though
(@Morgan) That she had feelings for him, or what he did with them?
(HH) Bit o' both
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) Let it go... apologise for not taking her question seriously, explain that you feel jealousy that she felt that way for Heinrich and its made you combative. Ask her to reassure you of her feelings for you. 
(@Morgan) How much sooner would the war have ended if one side or another had said "You know what, we disagree on this, but we don't need to be fighting about it"
(HH) Will tha' work?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) If you're sincere, maybe
* HH nods
(HH) First arguments always feel this bad?
(@Morgan) At least there's a proper reason
(HH) Yours wasn't?
(@Morgan) I'm currently in a bad mood with Molly because of a dream... 
* HH laughs
(HH) What?! That's crazy
(@Morgan) I am crazy, it seems
(HH) What did she do?
(@Morgan) Its long, complicated and, realistically, not important. 
* HH shrugs
(HH) You gonna just sit up here and brood about it all night?
(@Morgan) No, I'm talking to the cat
* @Morgan sighs
(HH) What?
(@Morgan) Its pathetic. Getting angry about things in a dream
(HH) Only if you act on it, I guess?
(@Morgan) Ask Claudia about Love's requiem, my view on acting on dreams isn't what it was
(HH) Why doncha save me the trouble an' tell me?
(@Morgan) You won't believe me
(HH) When 'ave I ever not believed you? 'Cept when you told me you'd gotten married all secret-like, but tha' was pretty unexpected
* @Morgan eyes him up skeptically 
(@Morgan) I dreamed that we encountered a ship called Loves Requiem, flying flags of distress. We went to help, naturally, but it was a trap. We all died, thrown to the sharks, and the ship was taken.
(HH) And?
(@Morgan) Following morning from the nest there's a cry of a ship in distress... Loves Requiem, flying distress flags. We prepped for battle, sailed towards them and hit them at the last minute, just as the crew were getting ready to try to ensnare the ship
(HH) Right. Bit of a coincidence
(@Morgan) Same name, same circumstance, same damage painted on the sails... 
(HH) A lot of a coincidence?
* @Morgan raises an eyebrow
(HH) Alright, weird then. What did she do in the dream that you think she might do in reality?
(@Morgan) Oh I don't... its just pissed me off
(HH) Makes no sense
(@Morgan) I didn't say it did
(HH) Bit like you really. What are you gonna do about it?
(@Morgan) Try not to think about it and let it go
* HH nods
(HH) Want company?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) if you want... don't you think you'd be better served going and apologising to your wife?
(HH) Don't know much about marital arguments, but I do know not to wake Inga when she's sleepin'
* @Morgan shuffles over to make room
* HH climbs up, squeezing in. Ten seconds later, he sneezes
(HH) Brings back mem'ries
(@Morgan) does rather
(HH) Weird dream about the ship the only premonition you've 'ad?
(@Morgan) Thats the only one worth noting
(HH) You and Molly argue much?
(@Morgan) No, not really... we've too much against us to waste time doing that
(HH) Like what?
(@Morgan) We seem to spend most of our time trying to avoid death or serious injury
* @Morgan frowns
(@Morgan) did I tell you I've been in a mine?
(HH) Yep
(HH) Think you tomd me about the ship and the dream too, but I've 'ad stuff on my mind since
* @Morgan nods
(HH) Partly tryin' to remind my wife tha' yours doesn't need all the gory details of our honeymoon
(@Morgan) I'd give that right up if I were you
(HH) Why do they do that?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) Not a clue, never have had
* @Morgan looks around the horizon
(HH) **theres nothing. Only the moon and stars to see tonight
(HH) Molly doesn't mind you doing middle watch?
(@Morgan) She's not terribly keen on it, but she knows how much it means to me to do it
(HH) She's not grumpy if you wake 'er up?
* @Morgan shakes his head
(@Morgan) we don't get _that_ much time together, so everything we do is appreciated
* HH sniggers
(HH) Hence why we're all told to stay away
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) if you had so much demand on your time, you'd understand
(HH) Use me, get yourself some time back
(@Morgan) Your wife would not be pleased
(HH) Inga is a workin' girl, she's quite happy stealin' time with me here an' there
(@Morgan) That brings us nicely round to something... I know she's spent a long time in service to my family, but she's more than that now
* HH nods
(HH) She is
(@Morgan) Does she know that?
(HH) I think so, why?
(@Morgan) I don't want her thinking she's a servant... does that make sense? She's our friend, Molly adores her
(HH) What makes you think she does think she is?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) she tends to dive out of the way whenever I'm around
(HH) I'll talk to her 'bout it
* @Morgan nods, offering him some coffee
* HH drinks some
(HH) Didnt think I'd be doin' this again
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) its not too different to what I was doing in Avalon, if I'm honest
(HH) Wondered often wha' you were up to
(@Morgan) Avoiding Yensid mostly
(HH) Cant blame ya for tha'
(HH) 'pparently we're having another lesson tomorrow
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) yes... you need it
(HH) We're all gonna have accents still. Can't  lose it so much with an accented teacher
(@Morgan) It'd take longer than tha' anyway
* HH nods
(HH) Its cute though
(@Morgan) I know
(HH) She nervous 'bout goin' home?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) particularly about seeing her siblings
(HH) Anythin' we can do?
(@Morgan) Love and support, I'd say. Its a deep seated issue from long ago
(HH) We can manage tha'. You worried?
(@Morgan) A little. Old wounds, y'know?
* HH hands the coffee back
* @Morgan takes it, sipping it
(HH) Yeah. Carleon first. Anythin' interestin' there?
(@Morgan) A decent coffee house... a dr I need to visit
(HH) What's wrong with ya?
(@Morgan) Nothing beating the crap out of him won't fix
(HH) Whys tha'?
(@Morgan) He hurt Molly
(HH) Sounds like a crappy doctor
(@Morgan) He is
(HH) You need help or a cover story? She know what you're gonna do?
(@Morgan) I may have mentioned my intentions, some time ago
(HH) Tuesday,  after yer back from the weddin'?
(@Morgan) soon as I get opportunity realistically
(HH) Not monday though?
(@Morgan) aye
(HH) Gonna be weird for me,  not being at Die Dauerhaftigkeit that day
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) It'll be strange having loved ones around
* HH nods
(HH) Better though. Last two years I did some gardening and the like jus' tidyin' up the graveyard. Figured if we were gonna get a sightin' of ya it'd be that place on that day
(@Morgan) I wrote to Sascha and Otto, last year the letter came back. I nearly beat the messenger 
(HH) Well now. I asked Otto back near the beginnin' to let me know if he heard anythin'
* HH nudges him for the coffee
(@Morgan) I've been given to understand the letters did not arrive
(HH) How come?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) secret society
(HH) Collecting letters?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) intercepting
* @Morgan grins at him briefly before sipping his coffee
(HH) Sounds fun
* @Morgan hands the coffee over
* HH drinks some
(HH) How'dya find out?
(@Morgan) oh, you're taking me seriously...
(HH) You dont bullshit much
(@Morgan) Not much
* HH shrugs
(HH) Why'd you write to them and not Claudia or me?
(@Morgan) They'd lost their daughter and granddaughter, people we shared. You'd only lost me, I figured you'd be fine without me, just carry on... Claudia's divested me of that opinion. I'm sorry.
(HH) Lemme guess... _HeinzHarold_ was a mess... _HeinzHarold_ was really upset?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) Were you?
(HH) Dont be thinking that's not her displacing a lot of her feelings. I was, but so was she, she just cant admit it
(@Morgan) I know, I picked up on it.
* HH sips the coffee "Easier for her to make it seem like I was in bits whilst she was fine. We were rudderless, but we kept on sailing"
(@Morgan) I understand it better now... her need to seem unaffected
(HH) Go on then, head doctor, enlighten this mere mortal
(@Morgan) No... its hers to explain if she chooses to. She loves you though, that much is obvious 
(HH) Loves you too. She'd have come searching for you if I'd agreed to help
(@Morgan) Thats... part of why I didn't write... we spent the war dragging information out of people, finding me wouldn't have been that hard, especially once you'd heard how I was acting
(HH) Tha's the thing wi' us, we'd find each other anywhere. I wasn't comin' to find you just cos she wanted to, your Father wanted me to.  If you'd needed or wanted me, you knew how to find me
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I missed you, both of you
* HH nods
(HH) Made me think o' when my Da died, an' how I just wanted to run away fr'm it all go out in th' woods and be alone. I couldn't,  cos I had to be th' man o' the family. My Ma and sisters needed me
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I couldn't bear to be around anymore
(HH) Wouldn't 'ave stayed day an' night in that house if I hadn't had to, so I guess I could unnerstand how you could just wanna go and deal alone
* @Morgan nods
* HH hands the coffee back
* @Morgan takes it, sipping it
(HH) Then, o' course there was this mag'cal unicorn, and she said "Oh, HeinzHarold, you sexy man beast, you funniest person to ever walk Theah, leave your less sexy less funny man beast friend in the wilderness, for he has a great destiny to catch a scarlet haired siren with his grumpy yet compelling face and mobile eyebrows, and bring her back to the land of wonders that us Sudlachenburg and get about a thousand children upon her. Heed me, and I will make you even gorgeous than you are now"
** New query from Morgan (Available on submenu 'Windows')
(HH) Will make you even more gorgeouser than you are now"
* HH shrugs "' An' that's why I looked so well when you turned up again, see?"
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) makes total sense
(HH) Gotta listen to them mag'cal unicorns
(@Morgan) absolutely
(HH) I was sceptical, o'course. I mean, who knew you could manage attract two really stunning women,  eh?
(@Morgan) absolutely beats me
(HH) HH: Makes no sense, does it? You must 'ave some luck on yer side
(@Morgan) I mean, I was charming first time around... I've been little but in a foul temper the last couple of years, so it cant be that
(HH) Molly's obviously got weird taste
(@Morgan) she likes you, so that just proves it
(HH) She likes me because I'm handsome, funny and know how to flirt. 'Pparently those arent essentials though!
* @Morgan shrugs
(HH) Must just be good in bed *he shrugs too, handing the coffee back*
* @Morgan shrugs, sipping it
(@Morgan) Good enough at least
(HH) Inga will let me know if she hears of anything you need to improve
(@Morgan) Then I hope she doesn't mention anything
(HH) We'll see. Give me some of tha' blanket,  my wife wont be happy if my calls have frozen off cos of you
* @Morgan hands it over
(@Morgan) wuss
(HH) Yours wont care if your balls fall off? Sounds like you've got improvin' to do!
(@Morgan) I'm just hardier than you
* HH wraps the blanket round himself "Whatever. Dya 'ave to take up so much space? It's like sharing a bucket wi' an ox!"
(@Morgan) I can't really take up any less
* HH keeps up a familiar steady stream of complaining, ribbing and bizarre made up stories right through til the watch ends, just like so many watches on different ships before. HH stays up to talk to Claudia when the watch swaps, leaving Morgan to go back to his chambers for the more than three remaining hours til dawn
(HH) ((So I know for next time, sleeping? If so, bed or couch?))
(@Morgan) ((No, he'll stay up and write down his dream))
(HH) ((Okay))
** Morgan has quit (Quit: Leaving)
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(Molly) **The night rolls on, and theres no sign of Molly or Varick before it's time to watch the sunrise*
* @Morgan heads back out on deck
** You're now known as Claudia
* Claudia is in her usual spot, just watching off eastwards
(@Morgan) Morning
(Claudia) Morning. Coming up?
* @Morgan climbs up
(Claudia) I sent HeinzHarold to find an empty cabin and get some sleep
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) You and he spoke?
(Claudia) For quite a while. He told me what he did
* @Morgan nods
(Claudia) Surprised he didn't see that for what it was
(@Morgan) Remarkably naive
(Claudia) Very. They'll be alright though
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I expect so
(Claudia) Maybe he'll learn to be more careful.
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) perhaps
(Claudia) Otherwise you'll have to have him for all your watches up there
(@Morgan) And put up with that amount of moaning? No, I think not
(Claudia) I couldn't do it. Silence is best for middle watch
(@Morgan) The cat tends to meow at me quite a bit
(Claudia) Bearable. You slept?
(@Morgan) Not yet
(Claudia) Sorgi wanted you lead watch for the forenoon
(@Morgan) So you lot can learn some more?
(Claudia) Yes
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) alright
(Claudia) Will you be too tired?
(@Morgan) I'll be fine
* Claudia nods, watching the sky rapidly lighten
(Claudia) We'll be there the day after tomorrow. How long is the ride to the place we're staying ((it'll take them most of the day))?
(@Morgan) A fair part of the day
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) Who's going?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) There's a plan I expectg
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) I'll ask Molly shall I? She seems to be in charge of all these journeys
(@Morgan) Never waste a talent... besides, I happen to know it annoys people in my societal circles that I don't do it all
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) Do you want to spar with her this afternoon?
(@Morgan) Probably an idea
(Claudia) She needs new opponents
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) good idea
(Claudia) Given that you picked her up in Avalon,shes's not bad
(@Morgan) I started her off... what would you expect?
(Claudia) That she'd have been better with me *she grins*
(Claudia) **The sun rises just on the horizon,  making the water sparkle
(@Morgan) naturally
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) Are you going to go off the rails like in Zweibrucke? Do I need to be prepared to keep you under guard?
* @Morgan looks at her seriously
(@Morgan) I don't know
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) How bad could it get?
* @Morgan shrugs
(Claudia) Do you think we need Heinzharold too?
(@Morgan) I don't know... I'd like to, but I think we'll need him to be with Varick
(Claudia) Best not take Varick
(@Morgan) No
(@Morgan) He's coming to meet Molly's siblings though
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) You'll  be back to normal by then?
(@Morgan) Hopefully
* Claudia looks at the sunrise
(Claudia) How bad were you the last two years?
(@Morgan) I nearly beat a messenger to death for not delivering a letter last year
* Claudia nods
(Claudia) Nightmares?
** You are now disconnected (Ping timeout)

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Thursday, 20 May 2021 20:08:14 British Summer Time
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(@Morgan) I may just avoid sleep
** Claudia has quit (Remote host closed the connection)
(ClaudiaR) That sounds dangerous if you're already under stress
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) After last time, I don't know
* ClaudiaR nods
(ClaudiaR) Have to wait and see I suppose. You had best get breakfast before your watch
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) Aye, I suppose so
* ClaudiaR just nods, watching the dawn some more
* @Morgan drops himself down the rigging, heading to the galley
(ClaudiaR) **he manages to get breakfast with mo issue, and has fifteen minutes spare before his watch once he's eaten
* @Morgan heads to find Molly
** You're now known as Molly
-NickServ- This nickname is registered. Please choose a different nickname, or identify via /msg NickServ identify <password>.
-NickServ- You are now identified for Molly.
* Molly is sat doing her hair in trousers and a loose corset
(@Morgan) blossom
* Molly looks over her shoulder at him with a smile
(Molly) Good morning, are you well? I thought you might come to bed after your watch
(@Morgan) I didn't want to risk another nightmare... Sorgi's asked I lead the watch again while you teach them some more
* Molly nods a little
(Molly) It'll be good practice for if you go off captaining, my love
* @Morgan frowns
(@Morgan) maybe
(Molly) Why wouldn't it be?
(@Morgan) I'm still not sure I should
(Molly) Why not?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) I wrote my dream for you
* Molly nods
(Molly) You wish me to read it before you start your watch?
(@Morgan) No, its there for when you wish to
* Molly frowns ever-so-slightly
(Molly) Alright liebling
(@Morgan) problem?
(Molly) Its... you dont normally write them _for me_. I'm curious as to why
(@Morgan) No but you read them anyway... 
(Molly) I dont normally read any you have put in... do you think I ought to?
(@Morgan) I thought you did
(Molly) No liebling. If you want to tell me, you'll tell me. They're there incase something comes up, that's all
(@Morgan) I'd like you to read it... Since I'm worried thats how you feel...
* Molly twists up her hair, pinning it
(Molly) Alright liebling, I should have time before everyone arrives
* @Morgan nods, checking his pocket watch
(Molly) **he's got about ten minutes before his watch starts*
* Molly starts tightening her corset
(@Morgan) Do you want help with that before I start my watch?
(Molly) Always
* Molly faces away from him, watching him in the mirror
(Molly) Will you take a nap after lunch?
* @Morgan moves to help with the lacing
(@Morgan) possibly, aye
(Molly) I can stay with you, it's about the only quiet we get nowadays
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) true
* Molly continues to watch him quietly whilst he works
(Molly) A little tighter please
* @Morgan tightens it some more
(Molly) Mmmhmm that's tight enough, thank you
* Molly sighs
(Molly) You need to go now?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) best had
* Molly turns to watch him
(Molly) I'm still not worrying...
* Molly watches his reaction
(Molly) I mean, I would feel different, wouldn't I?
(@Morgan) I... possibly.
(Molly) It's almost certainly the cast. Or possibly I am in the early stages of an illness like with the consumption...?
* @Morgan wrinkles his nose
(@Morgan) probably the cast
* Molly nods
(Molly) I'm never late. Down to almost the hour except when I had consumption
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) But the cast was a big thing
* Molly nods
(Molly) It was. It'll be that.
* Molly stands up
(Molly) You'd best go, liebes herz, she won't sail by herself
** You are now disconnected (Ping timeout)

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Thursday, 20 May 2021 21:08:21 British Summer Time
------------------------------

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(Moll) [21:03] (Molly) You'd best go, liebes herz, she won't sail by herself
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I'll see you later blossom
* Moll watches him a long moment
(Moll) Yes, liebling. I'll get it read before lunch
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I love you
* Moll blushes, clearly surprised, and smiles broadly
(Moll) And I, you. Very very much.
* @Morgan nods, heading out of the room
(Moll) **he gets up on the deck, and very soon he's in charge again, running along the southern coast of Avalon, lots of other ships to watch and avoid.
** Morgan has quit (Quit: Leaving)
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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Friday, 21 May 2021 18:06:28 British Summer Time
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** You have joined #7thseaic
** cantillon.be.eu.blitzed.org sets mode(s) +nt 
** ChanServ sets mode(s) -o  Molly
(Molly) **His watch is enjoyable, facing these easy challenges with ease, and he arrives to lunch as the rest of his watch do. He also finds HH, Inga and Varick there, the couple looking lovingly at each other once more.
** You're now known as Inga
** Morgan has joined #7thseaic
** ChanServ sets mode(s) +o  Morgan
(Inga) **His watch is enjoyable, facing these easy challenges with ease, and he arrives to lunch as the rest of his watch do. He also finds HH, Inga and Varick there, the couple looking lovingly at each other once more.
(Inga) V: Morgan!
(@Morgan) Varick
(Inga) V: We had a lesson, and HeinzHarold and Inga got told off
(@Morgan) oh?
(Inga) V: They were making kissy faces at each other
* Inga looks a bit embarrassed, but HH grins
(@Morgan) I see... so they weren't paying attention...
(Inga) V: *he shakes his head* no
(@Morgan) oh dear
(Inga) Molly said she'd be along in a minute, there was something she needed to do first.
* @Morgan nods
(Inga) **lunch is a noisy affair, and Ulysses is fed by all the sailors, strutting the table like a king. Molly still hasn't arrived ten minutes later.
(@Morgan) Will you excuse me? I'm going to make sure she's alright
(Inga) Shall we watch Varick til his nap?
(@Morgan) please
* Inga and the others seem happy getting on with lunch and chatting
* @Morgan excuses himself and goes to find Molly
** You're now known as Molly
(Molly) Everything is very quiet when he gets to his study
* @Morgan enters
* Molly isn't in there. The bedroom door is closed
** You are now disconnected (Ping timeout)

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Friday, 21 May 2021 18:44:26 British Summer Time
------------------------------

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(Molly) [18:40] * Molly isn't in there. The bedroom door is closed
* @Morgan walks through to the bedroom
* Molly is sat on the bed, favourite shawl over her shoulders, his dream recollection in her lap. She looks up at him, drawing up a smile
(Molly) I'm sorry, I have been longer than I expected. How was your watch?
(@Morgan) It went well
(Molly) I didn't expect it wouldn't, but I'm glad nonetheless
* Molly shuffles over from the middle of the bed, making more space available
(Molly) Is Varick ready for his nap?
* @Morgan comes and sits beside her
(@Morgan) no, Inga and HeinzHarold are watching him until he is
(Molly) Alright. They are still fawning over each other?
* @Morgan nods
* Molly smiles
(Molly) Good, that is much better than when she came to me just after you left
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) he told me about it
(Molly) Easily fixed. Silly boy.
* Molly smiles
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) Delayed the lesson a little to make them sit down and talk about it, but no harm done
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) the lesson went well?
(Molly) Well enough, though I doubt either of them will recall much
(Molly) Have you eaten, liebling?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) some, aye
* Molly nods, glancing at the paper
(Molly) There's rather a lot to take in here, isn't there?
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) This Molly absolutely should not have gotten married again, don't you think?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I reckon so
(Molly) I do wonder, as she didn't want children, whether she had been pushed by the Nieblungen to make the convergence
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) quite possibly
(Molly) Perhaps with Sebastian dead, there was no other way of it happening in the next generation down?
** You are now disconnected (Ping timeout)

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Friday, 21 May 2021 19:33:51 British Summer Time
------------------------------

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(MollyK) [19:30] (Molly) Perhaps with Sebastian dead, there was no other way of it happening in the next generation down?
** Molly has quit (Remote host closed the connection)
* @Morgan nods
(MollyK) But this bit, her taking lovers on her trips... that seems implausible to me
(@Morgan) Does it? Or is that because you object to the idea?
* MollyK raises an eyebrow slightly
(MollyK) She's distressed enough that he fears for her life at times, and her need to be walking in their old footsteps because she's still so tied to him, yet she can take this time to symbolically be with him, yet be in someone else's bed? Seems almost impossible
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I suppose so
(MollyK) The only way in which it would make sense would be if those lovers were used as faceless physical substitutes for her late husband
* MollyK scans the document
* @Morgan nods
(MollyK) Do you presently question _my_ fidelity?
* MollyK glances up at him from the text
(@Morgan) No, of course not
(MollyK) Even knowing there could have been other men I could have settled down with?
(@Morgan) But you didn't
(MollyK) No
(MollyK) But since when is jealousy or possessiveness rational?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) it feels like you have an attachment to this Sebastian 
(MollyK) In your dream?
* @Morgan screws up his nose
(@Morgan) Not necessarily 
* MollyK frowns
(MollyK) I am curious about the circumstances that could have led me along that path, but I am not attached to him. He's nothing more to me than a character in a story
(@Morgan) You seemed quite... upset and driven to find out
* MollyK watches him
(MollyK) You are feeling jealous and possessive in reality,  not just the dream
(@Morgan) A little
(MollyK) You need not. You are what I need and want
* @Morgan nods
(MollyK) I suppose it is interesting to me. I always knew that if things had been different, you would have been perfectly happy without having met me. I didn't think it was possible that I could have been happy without having met you
* @Morgan nods
(MollyK) That is what troubles you most?
(@Morgan) No... that you seemed as attached to Sebastian as you are to the children in the dreams
(MollyK) And why does that trouble you?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) I dont like you having feelings for anyone but me
* MollyK nods seriously
(MollyK) But I dont.
(@Morgan) Thats not how it seems
* MollyK frowns slightly
(MollyK) But I don't.
* @Morgan nods
* MollyK sighs slightly
(MollyK) What have I done that's given you that impression?
(@Morgan) as I said, you just seemed very attached to him
(MollyK) I am not. I have no idea who he is, and even if I did, it would not matter. _You_ are everything to me.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) very well
* MollyK watches him
(MollyK) What else assurance can I give you?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) did you get anywhere finding out who he is?
(MollyK) No, Claudia and Heinzharold dont remember anyone called Sebastian
(@Morgan) Did HeinzHarold tell you about the Thean origin of the name?
(MollyK) No, Thean is it?
(@Morgan) I forget what it means... I do remember the slight insult from HeinzHarold as to the reason he knows it
* MollyK tilts her head thoughtfully, and distractedly says "what insult?"
(@Morgan) He was bored, I was playing my guitar, badly apparently
(MollyK) Why he learnt the meaning of Sebastian? And you are very good.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) he just picked up a book and read it
* MollyK smiles
(MollyK) That's generally the point of them.  My asking questions troubles you because you worry I will try to find him?
(@Morgan) No... because I felt you were attached to him as you are the children, as I said
(MollyK) But we do not have children... is it a concern for the future?
* @Morgan frowns... I know we don't have children... I mean the ones you dream of
(MollyK) I'm sorry, liebes herz, I am just trying to understand what it is you fear happening
(@Morgan) I don't know how to make it any clearer
(MollyK) It sounds as if you are concerned that even if we had children my love for you and them would not prevent me leaving you all for him
(@Morgan) No... thats not what I said
(MollyK) Are you hurt rather than concerned?
* @Morgan nods
* MollyK nods slowly
(MollyK) I do not know what I can do to help that. I dont have feelings for him, or for anyone but you. Not will I ever.
(MollyK) Nor*
* @Morgan nods
* MollyK draws her knees up
(MollyK) Is there anything you would have me do?
* @Morgan shakes his head
* MollyK nods sadly
(MollyK) I'm sorry. I know this must have been very painful for you
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) it was rahter
* MollyK nods, looking over it once more with a sigh
(MollyK) There's nothing pleasant to say about it. It's hard to read.
* @Morgan nods
(MollyK) Your sadness, and you hopelessness is so clear. That you were letting me go in the hopes of competing with him almost, despite how awful it was...
* @Morgan nods
(MollyK) Not at all easy to bear
(@Morgan) No, not really
(MollyK) You wanted me to read it so you knew I did not feel that way about him?
(@Morgan) No, because that sense of abandonment and feeling second best is something I worry you feel
(MollyK) You don't abandon me. I admit, I felt a little sad when you needed to be away from me in Zweibrucke, but that was because I did not know your true motivation
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) but you wish me to sail alone for weeks
* MollyK thinks on this
(MollyK) I want you to be able to have your childhood dream. I dont want to limit your sailing because you have a wife and child.
* @Morgan nods slowly
(MollyK) Besides, that would be different. It would not be because you couldn't bear to be with me, or felt disloyal by being with me *she fiddles with the fringing on the edge of the scarf, not making eye contact*
* @Morgan watches her
* MollyK glances up at him
(MollyK) I know that's not why it was, but that was my initial concern
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) No, it wasn't
(MollyK) It's just... complicated, I suppose. You do not have to go off sailing if you dont wish to
(@Morgan) Its... a difficult decision
(MollyK) Why?
(@Morgan) Because I don't wish to be away from you for that long
(MollyK) But you would not get the full experience of Captaining with me at your side
* @Morgan nods
* MollyK smiles
(MollyK) It is up to you, liebes herz
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I'll think on it
(MollyK) I will have plenty to do, I will not feel abandoned
(MollyK) And it is likely I will be able to talk to you from Innsbruck when I'm there for the wedding
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) probably
(MollyK) I'm sure you would manage quite well without me
* @Morgan shrugs
(MollyK) Are you concerned I am asking you to go for the wrong reasons?
* @Morgan frowns
(@Morgan) how do you mean?
(MollyK) Does my motive worry you? Do you worry I wish to be away from you?
(@Morgan) A little I suppose
(MollyK) That is not the case. I want nothing more than to please you
* @Morgan nods
* MollyK sighs, pulling the shawl around her and over her knees too
(MollyK) As for the second best thing... that's a long topic and has many different aspects to it. If you really want to discuss it, I think we ought to make sure Varick is settled for his nap and we wont get interrupted
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) probably a good idea
* MollyK nods
(MollyK) Would you like me to go?
** You are now disconnected (Ping timeout)

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Friday, 21 May 2021 21:24:44 British Summer Time
------------------------------

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(Molly) [21:18] (MollyK) Would you like me to go?
(@Morgan) No, why on Theah would you think that?
(Molly) To put Varick for his nsp
(@Morgan) Ah, I see... probably better had
* Molly nods. She pauses a moment, then kisses his cheek
(Molly) ((Shes paying attention to this response closely, particularly how welcomed the contact is))
* @Morgan twists towards her slightly, inhaling
* Molly sighs happily, tilting her head a little to give him more access to the scent of her cheek, jaw, neck and hairline
* @Morgan inhales again before backing up a bit
* Molly smiles a little. "I'll be back soon". She climbs off the bed, then throws him the shawl. "For whilst I am gone "
* Molly goes out of the bedroom
** You are now disconnected (Ping timeout)

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Saturday, 22 May 2021 21:14:59 British Summer Time
------------------------------

** You have joined #7thseaic
** timtam.uk.eu.blitzed.org sets mode(s) +nt 
** ChanServ sets mode(s) -o  Molly
** You are now disconnected

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Logging started for Blitzed:#7thseaic on Sunday, 23 May 2021 17:14:52 British Summer Time
------------------------------

** You have joined #7thseaic
** timtam.uk.eu.blitzed.org sets mode(s) +nt 
** ChanServ sets mode(s) -o  Molly
** Morgan has joined #7thseaic
** ChanServ sets mode(s) +o  Morgan
* Molly returns about fifteen minutes later with a tea tray  and gives him a cup before she sits beside him, looking briefly to see what he has done with her shawl
* @Morgan has it in his hands in his lap
* Molly smiles then sips her tea, the cup rattling slightly in the saucer when she returns the first to the second. She takes a deep breath.
(Molly) Alright, Varick is asleep, Inga and HeinzHarold are… *her lips quirk with amusement a moment* not going to be coming to interrupt us, and I've locked the door so we have time to talk.
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) I am… not wary, exactly, but cautious. I do not want to hurt you, nor get hurt.
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) What is it you wish to know?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) I don't know
* Molly frowns a little
(Molly) Maybe we dont really need to talk. The dreams are just dreams, there's nothing to be worried over
(@Morgan) You said it was complicated, so explain it to me
(Molly) I don't feel like I am second-best, but I do have times when I think how much happier you were with her, or how much better suited she was to you than I am. Or, sometimes, just how much better she would have handled the things that I am unsure of with you, or that I am getting wrong.
(@Morgan) I was a different, easier person then... I don't think she would handle me as I am now particularly well at all
* Molly shrugs slightly
(Molly) Perhaps she would make less errors than I, or be less... challenging
(@Morgan) Perhaps... perhaps not.
(Molly) I wouldn't say I ever felt like second best, and certainly not like you did in the dream
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) good
* Molly sips her tea again
(Molly) I suppose I always felt like you belonged with her, and I was just where you have ended up due to circumstances.
* @Morgan sighs
(Molly) Please, do not take that as an insult, or a criticism.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I'll try not to
(Molly) I am always aware that you were hers first, and that you wouldn't have even given me a second glance, which is how it should be for a married man, of course. I...I think that is the same if it had been me first. Or, I hope so, at least.
* Molly watches him
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I don't doubt it
* Molly nods
(Molly) I always knew, when I became your mistress, and then when I accepted your proposal of marriage, that things would be more complicated for us than other couples. I knew that I would need to work within the space you could give me. I thought about that in advance of making both my decisions.
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) As I have said in the past to others, I knew the situation, and I wanted to be with you despite the extra challenges we would face together. I felt I loved you so entirely that all that mattered was that you loved me enough to want me at your side and to give me your protection.
(@Morgan) and now?
* Molly fidgets til she's sat crossed legged
(Molly) Now what?
(@Morgan) How do you feel in that respect now?
(Molly) The deeper intimacy, emotional and physical, you and I have developed has made me perhaps more… invested. I am perhaps more reliant on the depths of your love than I was.
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) Is that what you hoped I would say?
(@Morgan) I think so, aye
* Molly watches him over the rim
(Molly) Now I don't feel so much need to hold back. I know you can handle my love. That's good, it makes things much easier for me. But it removes the walls I have used to keep that feeling contained, and that makes me more vulnerable. And, as you know, being vulnerable isn't pleasant for me, I've shielded my heart much over the last few years due to my parents actions, so it's somewhat scary to let that go.
(@Morgan) I understand
* Molly nods
(Molly) You feel similarly?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) indeed
(Molly) I was holding back before. I didn't want to overwhelm you with the strength of my love and adoration, because I was afraid you would see it as pressure to love me more than enough.
* @Morgan nods
* Molly watches his body language for signs of openness, defensiveness or discomfort
* @Morgan leans forward, picking up his tea before sipping it
* Molly goes quiet, swirling the liquid
(@Morgan) You are comfortable that I do not see is as such now?
* Molly nods slowly
(Molly) Yes, I think so
(@Morgan) good
(Molly) Before Fischler, I felt you loved me much less. But only because I thought you were able to love so much less due to the pain you'd been through. I never felt that you were purposefully denying me your love. I believed you loved me one hundred percent of your capacity to love.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I do, it just so happens that is much more than you thought
* Molly smiles, blushing a little
(Molly) Its still surprising
(@Morgan) oh?
(Molly) I was... used to the idea that it was only enough, and that was enough for me. I didn't think it was possible for you to love me so much, and it still surprises me that you do
* @Morgan nods
* Molly sips her tea
(Molly) I know that you will always love her. Of course you will, she made you happy, and you shared so many wonderful times and new things with her. You would have stayed with her no matter what. I'd never expect or ask you not to love her.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I'm glad you understand that
(Molly) *she nods* If I had needed that from you, that you did not have those feelings for her still, I wouldn't have married you. It wouldn't have been fair to ask that from you, and I would have let you free to find a second wife who could be at peace with it.
(@Morgan) I doubt I would have found one
(Molly) A widow would have suited. People remarry often in Tawstock at least
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) It isn't always as easy as I would like. There are times I do feel envious, but I don't feel resentful, like you did in the dream.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) thats something at least
* Molly nods
(Molly) I'm not _jealous_, because I know that without her you would not be you
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) thats true
(Molly) You wouldn't have put your secrecy on the line, or put your heart on the line to win me if you hadn't learnt how incredibly beautiful and valuable love is, and you needed her for that
* Molly sips her tea
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) In your dream, you felt insignificant...
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) I've never felt insignificant. I have definitely felt far less significant though
* @Morgan frowns
(Molly) Why do you frown?
(@Morgan) You are not less significant
(Molly) I think I know that now
* Molly swirls the tea again
(@Morgan) you think?
* Molly frowns a little "bear in mind the suffering I have seen you go through, liebling. I've seen the intensity of it for more than two years. Then ask how on Theah I can be as significant."
(@Morgan) The Nieblungen say otherwise
(@Morgan) Also... ask Sorgi how I was in Zweibrucke
(Molly) I did. "Somewhat distressed and withdrawn" I believe he said
(@Morgan) I wouldn't call that insigificant
(Molly) No... as for the Nieblungen, like you said about whether your views on social status are yours or theirs, what if your feelings for me have been influenced by them for the good of the convergence
(@Morgan) Unlikely, since they planned for our lines to converge, not necessarily us
* Molly bites her lip
(Molly) You're right. I suppose it is just a concern because I dont deserve you
(@Morgan) I don't think you do, but not in the same way you think
(Molly) Why not?
(@Morgan) Because I don't think you've done anything bad enough to deserve dealing with me
(Molly) And I dont think I've done anything _good_ enough to
* Molly tilts her head
(Molly) Is that partly why the dreams are bothering you, because you think he would have been better for me?
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) That I can understand and empathise with. I know how hard that can be
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) And I know that it takes a great deal of work to feel that less
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) Surprisingly, Edward has been a great help for me with it
(@Morgan) oh?
(Molly) Telling me how much you obviously adore me, and so on. Maybe flattering my ego a little *she smiles*
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) I wouldn't have expected it, but he has been supportive, and aside from Inga and to a degree Evie, I've not really confided in anyone about it
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) He loves you very much
(Molly) We are developing a close sibling relationship I think
* @Morgan nods
* Molly looks thoughtful
(Molly) We confide in each other, I suppose
(@Morgan) oh?
(Molly) Like the reunion of Federest and Hannalore. We both found it hard
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) I would imagine so
(Molly) And so in that way we have something in common, a shared bond
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) Does that trouble you?
(@Morgan) No, I can't say it does
(Molly) I'm glad. Much as I find Inga supportive,  Edward understands more
(@Morgan) How so?
(Molly) He knows more about you than she does. He's spent more time with you
* @Morgan nods
* Molly takes a deep breath
(Molly) If it helps any, I do not think Seb would have been better for me than you. I feel that you are the right man for me
(@Morgan) You think so?
(Molly) Yes, I do. I love you, and we have come through so much together. He strikes me as too irreverent for that
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) You'll just have to trust me that I want you
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) alright
* Molly nods
(Molly) Was there anything you wished to ask me whilst I've already opened up and am being vulnerable? *she smiles*
(@Morgan) You really wish me to be away for so long?
(Molly) I will miss you most sorely, but I don't want you looking back one day and feeling regret
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) I don't want to be away from you, but I don't want you to give up your childhood dream because you feel so needed that you cannot escape to satisfy it *she watches him*
(@Morgan) but given how often danger finds us...
(Molly) You feel trapped by that?
(@Morgan) Its my duty to keep you safe
(Molly) That, my love,  is not an answer.
(@Morgan) I feel I shouldn't be away from you for that reason
(Molly) Have you been feeling that my encouragement is an indicator that I do not care about your presence?
(Molly) ((Ignore mine for now))
(Molly) If you could be sure I would be safe...?
* @Morgan shrugs
(@Morgan) maybe
(Molly) Have you been feeling that my encouragement is an indicator that I do not care about your presence?
(@Morgan) a little perhaps
(Molly) That is not the case. It is a sacrifice I am prepared to make for you
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) alright
* Molly nods
(Molly) Oh, at Jarvie's, when she asked about whether the variable appetite was normal...?
(@Morgan) yes...
(Molly) It seemed you were troubled about answering because I was there
* @Morgan shrugs
* Molly watches him closely
(Molly) Liebes herz, I have made myself incredibly vulnerable to you here to help you with the situation with the dreams. I would appreciate the same in return. Please don't hide.
(@Morgan) I can only answer from my experience with Dietlinde... I did not want to upset you by drawing on that
* Molly nods
(Molly) When it comes to the practicalities of pregnancy birth and childrearing I do not find it upsetting.  There are some things about the past that I will _never_ want to know, but when it comes to Jana, I don't feel that concern
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) You can imagine feeling the same?
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan)  aye
(Molly) Good. I do envy that sometimes, that I didn't get to share so many of those firsts with you, but I think there's always an element of that in any relationship. HeinzHarold and Inga, for example.
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) quite
* Molly smiles
(Molly) I suppose that is the benefit for you of marrying me when I am still so young and had such a puritanical upbringing!
(@Morgan) I suppose so
* Molly smiles, watching him
(Molly) I may not have been the first, but I do hope I'll be the last
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) thats the plan
* Molly nods
(Molly) I hope all this has reassured you
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) it has
(Molly) And I hope it hasn't been too painful or taxing
(@Morgan) Not too bad
* Molly sets aside her cup
(Molly) Now, theres one thing I would very much like to do with you
(@Morgan) oh?
* Molly picks up a pillow, smiling
(Molly) The outer door is locked, and we have some time...
* @Morgan nods
(Molly) And after such an emotional conversation,  there's one thing a naturally passionate girl needs... *she watches him with an innocentish smile*
(@Morgan) oh? 
(Molly) ... a nap beneath her favourite shawl with her beloved one *she giggles*
* @Morgan laughs
* Molly puts the pillow behind him, curling up to his chest
(Molly) I hope thats not a disappointment!
(@Morgan) This is perfectly welcomed
* Molly pulls the shawl over them both, yawning
(Molly) Good. There's not a place on Theah I'd rather be than in your arms
* @Morgan nods
(@Morgan) good
* Molly snuggles up, wrapping her arm over him. She manages only the first line of Kosk Yn Ta before they're both asleep
** You are now disconnected