**** BEGIN LOGGING AT Tue Jan 16 17:54:02 2024 Jan 16 17:54:02 * Morgan (~mads@192.168.1.117) has joined Jan 16 17:56:01 * Molly (~u931732@192.168.1.127) has joined Jan 16 17:56:19 F: I’d have thrown up Jan 16 17:56:19 *Alice glances at Morgan* Landlubbers... Jan 16 17:56:19 * Morgan laughs Jan 16 17:56:19 Mainz: I won’t repeat in front of the ladies what sailors are called by the army Jan 16 17:56:19 Is that because you can't remember the big words? Jan 16 17:56:21 *Mainz laughs* Jan 16 17:56:23 I believe it is along the lines of Fish Fanciers... Jan 16 17:56:25 *Federest smiles* Something like that, my Lady Jan 16 17:56:27 * Morgan smiles, drinking his whiskey Jan 16 17:57:06 K: How long are you staying in Eisen, Alice? Jan 16 17:57:36 A: I’m not sure. A couple more weeks, I think Jan 16 17:58:04 * Molly frowns slightly, just drinking her wine Jan 16 17:58:26 I'm hoping to persuade her to stay a bit longer than that Jan 16 17:59:08 A: I know you have the big wedding in early June... Jan 16 17:59:34 * Morgan nods Jan 16 17:59:40 I don't intend to stay away long for that Jan 16 18:01:19 I was thinking of ten days or so, to include travel Jan 16 18:02:53 A: I do think we should go home before that really Jan 16 18:03:51 If that is what you wish... Jan 16 18:05:16 A: perhaps we could come back and stay again at the end of summer? Jan 16 18:05:29 * Morgan nods Jan 16 18:05:38 You are always welcome Jan 16 18:05:43 [oh... we might not be here] Jan 16 18:05:59 [I can't really tell her that though] Jan 16 18:06:25 [no, but... she knows about my magic...] Jan 16 18:06:33 A: thank you Jan 16 18:06:42 [and?] Jan 16 18:07:12 [what if the quickening wasn’t until after she’d gone?] Jan 16 18:07:42 [As a reason we didn't tell her? Jan 16 18:07:53 K: Are you sailing her back to Avalon yourself, my Lord Jan 16 18:08:20 * Morgan shakes his head sadly Jan 16 18:08:29 No... it'll be some time before I sail again Jan 16 18:08:37 [as in, do you actually need to wait to tell her, when we can explain how I know he’s okay?] Jan 16 18:09:17 [I thought you did not want anyone else to know?] Jan 16 18:09:18 A: have you got a trip in mind? Jan 16 18:09:56 * Morgan shakes his head Jan 16 18:09:56 [it’s complicated, but I don’t want to just tell her through the mirror] Jan 16 18:10:15 No... there is word of islands south of Capperlucia... Jan 16 18:10:42 * Molly frowns Jan 16 18:10:46 are there? Jan 16 18:10:59 Where the dragons go to breed... Jan 16 18:11:39 That would be a long way... Jan 16 18:12:11 * Morgan smiles a little Jan 16 18:12:30 Wishful thinking I think... I don't know, maybe we'll visit my uncle again Jan 16 18:12:48 * Molly nods thoughtfully Jan 16 18:12:57 that’d be nice... Jan 16 18:13:33 * Morgan nods Jan 16 18:15:01 [Itd be safe to go around my birthday still, see the Rosenkrantzs...] Jan 16 18:15:28 [we'll have a look] Jan 16 18:16:25 [then I’ll get to see everyone before the baby comes] Jan 16 18:16:53 [That would be good] Jan 16 18:17:32 * Molly smiles slightly [show off my bump] Jan 16 18:18:14 * Morgan nods ever so slightly Jan 16 18:18:28 We'll have to see what my ships are doing Jan 16 18:19:01 A: aren’t you expecting another one? Jan 16 18:19:27 The Reconciliation, yes Jan 16 18:19:46 A: that’s an unusual name Jan 16 18:20:06 * Morgan nods Jan 16 18:21:08 I suppose it is... Jan 16 18:21:23 A: where is it from? Jan 16 18:21:35 It was Edwards idea Jan 16 18:22:31 *Karlsrule smiles* It’s better than what some of the men suggested instead the the lusty wench Jan 16 18:22:40 I dread to think Jan 16 18:23:46 F: It was, sort of, The Lady Of The Night’s Small Clothing, but it rhymed Jan 16 18:24:39 * Molly bites her lip, trying not to giggle Jan 16 18:25:34 * Morgan glances at her, sighing Jan 16 18:25:50 [whore’s drawers, my love] Jan 16 18:26:01 * Morgan shakes his head Jan 16 18:26:02 Oh dear Jan 16 18:26:34 Mainz: It was argued that everyone would want to work there then Jan 16 18:27:04 [suddenly the lusty wench is not so bad, hmm?] Jan 16 18:27:23 [no... definitely not] Jan 16 18:28:15 A: My godfather had a ship called The Fortuitous Wager Jan 16 18:28:29 Oh! I like that one! *she smiles* Jan 16 18:28:53 * Morgan nods Jan 16 18:28:56 Me too Jan 16 18:31:03 A: *she smiles* If I ever get another, she’ll be called *in Avalonian * Seas The Day Jan 16 18:31:32 A pun? Really? Jan 16 18:32:05 *Alice nods whilst Molly explains it to the Eisenmen Jan 16 18:32:29 F: I went on a ship called Shipfaced before Jan 16 18:33:15 * Morgan rolls his eyes Jan 16 18:33:29 * Molly smiles innocently “I don’t get it” Jan 16 18:33:45 Best ask Karlsruhe to explain it Jan 16 18:34:31 K: *he looks at Federest with a little disapproval* It’s a play on words that references being drink, my Lady Jan 16 18:34:35 drunk* Jan 16 18:35:02 * Morgan looks at Karlsruhe Jan 16 18:35:17 For future reference... that was what's known as 'artful innocence' and entirely not genuine. Jan 16 18:37:28 *Karlsruhe nods slightly * thank you, my Lord Jan 16 18:37:44 [spoiling my fun, mon petit chou] Jan 16 18:38:06 * Morgan smiles a little, drinking his whiskey Jan 16 18:40:05 *she sends him the image of her giving him that innocent look, but looking up at him whilst his placket is down and he’s hilted in her mouth* Jan 16 18:40:24 * Morgan coughs, putting the glass down Jan 16 18:44:47 * Molly smiles faintly. The others have moved on to talking about something else Jan 16 18:44:59 [when will you see Mina?] Jan 16 18:45:17 [Soon. Give them time to finish dinner...] Jan 16 18:47:00 [will you be long?] Jan 16 18:47:44 [hopefully. If its quick, I suspect it'll have gone badly] Jan 16 18:48:17 [I might stay in the drawing room with them to chat a while then] Jan 16 18:48:27 [of you wish] Jan 16 18:48:45 [it keeps my hands out of mischief] Jan 16 18:48:58 [good idea] Jan 16 18:49:39 * Molly watches him briefly before resuming eating [you are very nervous...] Jan 16 18:50:18 [Yes. I am. I could do irreparable damage to their marriage in the next hour] Jan 16 18:54:33 * Molly presses her leg to his beneath the table reassuringly Jan 16 18:55:13 [if your words can break it, it wasn’t strong enough to begin with. Jan 16 18:55:37 [Perhaps] Jan 16 18:56:47 *he can feel the protectiveness in her emotions* Jan 16 18:59:37 * Morgan sighs, finishing his whiskey Jan 16 19:00:23 *a refill is offered by a footman* Jan 16 19:00:52 * Morgan nods, thanking him Jan 16 19:01:52 *He’s on his third by the time dinner is done and the others are moving to the drawing room to play a few hands of poker. Molly hangs back, kissing his cheek* None of this is your fault Jan 16 19:02:17 * Morgan shrugs Jan 16 19:02:20 Some of it is Jan 16 19:12:27 No, my love. Choices were made in Numa, and accidents happened Jan 16 19:12:48 * Morgan sighs Jan 16 19:13:01 maybe. Try not to worry... I'll call for you once we're done Jan 16 19:14:18 Send Edward down if you wish my love, or I can go to him somewhere Jan 16 19:18:42 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:18:51 I thought you wanted to talk with the others Jan 16 19:21:43 If Edward needs me, it’s fine, my love Jan 16 19:21:53 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:21:57 I'll send him a note Jan 16 19:22:58 * Molly nods Jan 16 19:23:11 Alright, my love Jan 16 19:24:20 * Morgan nods, kissing her cheek Jan 16 19:24:53 I'll see you soon Jan 16 19:25:44 * Molly nods, letting him go Jan 16 19:26:04 * Morgan goes down to his office, writing a note for Edward before ringing the bell Jan 16 19:28:07 *One of the footmen appears* Jan 16 19:28:19 * Morgan hands him the note Jan 16 19:28:53 Would you take that to my brother, tell his wife that I wish to see her here, and have some wine and... some hot chocolate brought here... and a small hot water bottle Jan 16 19:29:44 *the footman takes it, returning ten minutes later with the tray containing these items* Lady Koertig is just coming, my Lord Jan 16 19:30:33 * Morgan nods, thanking him. And putting the tray on the desk before sitting in one of the chairs on the 'guest' side of the desk Jan 16 19:31:54 * Molly is now known as Mina Jan 16 19:33:26 * Mina is shown in two minutes later. Her hair isn’t as formal, and looks like it’s been quite hastily put up. Her make up is softer too. This is a Mina his teenage self would have been even more loopy over Jan 16 19:34:00 * Morgan stands, dismissing the footman before coming to her, holding out his hands Jan 16 19:35:17 * Mina smiles taking his hands. Though she looks less formal, her mannerisms aren’t Jan 16 19:35:24 Good evening, Morgan Jan 16 19:35:40 * Morgan kisses her hand briefly Jan 16 19:35:56 Mina. I'm glad you're here Jan 16 19:36:45 Thank you. I have not been to Hafenlohr before, though Edward wrote of it often. I hope you will give me a tour of your home as I gave you one of mine Jan 16 19:37:15 Of course, it'd be my pleasure. Jan 16 19:37:30 * Morgan smiles a little Jan 16 19:37:42 I'd like to give you a hug... may I? Jan 16 19:38:05 * Mina nods a moment Jan 16 19:38:11 You may Jan 16 19:38:20 * Morgan smiles, wrapping his arms about her Jan 16 19:38:29 My sister... I have missed you Jan 16 19:38:55 * Mina hugs him, but he feels her chest kept less pressed to him Jan 16 19:39:14 I have missed you too, I trust you are well? Jan 16 19:39:28 * Morgan lets her go Jan 16 19:39:46 mostly. Nightmares and worries aside, I'm fine... and you? Jan 16 19:40:35 * Mina smiles in that courtly sort of way “the journey here was smooth, thank you. Heinzharold drives better than I expected” Jan 16 19:40:54 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:41:05 Don't tell anyone but he's not nearly so dense as people think Jan 16 19:41:30 * Mina nods Jan 16 19:41:38 Inga has told me much about him Jan 16 19:41:52 * Morgan nods, offering her a seat Jan 16 19:42:33 * Mina sits, smoothing her skirt. The soft pink looks even nicer in the firelight Jan 16 19:43:01 * Morgan sits in the chair next to her, angling it so they can talk easily without facing her directly Jan 16 19:43:15 Besotted, the pair of them Jan 16 19:45:02 * Mina nods, watching the fire Jan 16 19:45:18 They have a lovely relationship Jan 16 19:45:51 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:46:29 Do you think... we can attempt the openness we had in Graben? Jan 16 19:47:06 I do not feel much like being open here, but I will endeavour to Jan 16 19:47:55 * Morgan nods before sighing Jan 16 19:49:18 This is more difficult than I anticipated Jan 16 19:49:41 It is. It all is. Jan 16 19:49:57 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:50:01 Do you trust me? Jan 16 19:50:08 Yes Jan 16 19:50:15 How much? Jan 16 19:50:35 I was unaware there was a rating system Jan 16 19:51:59 Oh, absolutely... I trust my staff to do a -very- good job, I trust HeinzHarold with my childrens lives... Jan 16 19:52:11 I wouldn't trust him with my bacon. Jan 16 19:52:21 * Mina laughs Jan 16 19:53:08 No, I noticed the household accounts had a significant spike in bacon cost, far above what a normal celebration would take Jan 16 19:53:23 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:53:35 And supplies for chocolate cake too, I imagine Jan 16 19:53:45 A little, yes Jan 16 19:54:04 Mmhmmm, that'll be Varicks effect... Jan 16 19:54:51 * Mina nods Jan 16 19:55:03 He has grown since December Jan 16 19:55:09 * Morgan nods Jan 16 19:55:27 He amazes me sometimes... such a wonderful, loving boy Jan 16 19:56:30 * Mina nods Jan 16 19:56:37 Indeed Jan 16 19:57:21 Last time we spoke we talked about what was going on... Jan 16 19:57:56 we did Jan 16 19:58:39 * Mina glances at him “shall I pour drinks?” Jan 16 19:59:03 I was getting to that... we have wine or hot chocolate... I thought it might be more comforting Jan 16 19:59:13 * Mina nods Jan 16 19:59:29 I would like hot chocolate, thank you Jan 16 19:59:45 * Morgan nods, pouring a cup each, handing it to her Jan 16 20:00:02 I'm going to say something entirely inappropriate, so... brace yourself... Jan 16 20:00:38 * Mina smiles faintly Jan 16 20:00:45 I am braced Jan 16 20:01:27 By my reckoning, your course is due... I know it can be uncomfortable to say the least... Dietlinde used to find holding a hot water bottle to her tummy helped, hence *he points to it* Jan 16 20:01:59 * Mina just nods slightly “That is thoughtful” Jan 16 20:02:17 * Morgan shrugs Jan 16 20:02:25 I love you, I want to make you comfortable Jan 16 20:03:35 * Mina nods, and stands to take it. When she sits with it, she seems to look to his approval, to check that she has satisfied him in that Jan 16 20:03:53 * Morgan smiles Jan 16 20:04:20 You don't -have- to use it if you don't want to... but I see no point in suffering in silence if it can be eased. Jan 16 20:04:34 It is nice Jan 16 20:04:58 * Morgan sips his chocolate Jan 16 20:05:28 good. Where to start? Jan 16 20:05:49 * Mina smiles slightly Jan 16 20:06:07 I did not picture you as a hot chocolate drinker Jan 16 20:06:33 Generally I'm not... but its not as horrific as I imagined Jan 16 20:06:55 * Mina nods Jan 16 20:07:16 It is not too sweet? I know you do not like it sweet Jan 16 20:07:27 * Morgan smiles Jan 16 20:07:48 Its... sweeter than I'd like, but not so sweet as to be unpleasant Jan 16 20:08:38 * Mina nods, sipping hers delicately Jan 16 20:09:32 Its not too bitter for you? Jan 16 20:10:11 * Mina shakes her head “I have a wide palette” Jan 16 20:11:04 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:11:44 * Mina smiles faintly, sipping it again. The fire crackles quietly Jan 16 20:12:04 Where shall we start? I recall last time you were expecting me to berate yu Jan 16 20:12:11 Was I? Jan 16 20:12:17 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:12:48 Asked if I'd like to berate you as Molly had done... and truthfully that was what I had intended but we talked instead, about your fears... Jan 16 20:13:04 * Mina nods solemnly Jan 16 20:13:15 It is difficult Jan 16 20:13:40 Yes... I know, as I know talking about all of it now will be Jan 16 20:13:54 * Mina nods Jan 16 20:14:17 Yes, it will. Jan 16 20:15:10 I understand you and Edward had words when you last spoke with the mirrors Jan 16 20:15:35 We have many words. Jan 16 20:16:29 You know what you asked of him was unkind, cruel even, don't you? Jan 16 20:16:50 * Mina frowns slightly Jan 16 20:17:51 I am tired of being expected to be the bigger person about this. It is not wrong that I want my husband to wish he hadn’t hurt me. Jan 16 20:18:21 No... it isn't... but its wrong to ask him to say he wished she had not been born. You will understand that Jan 16 20:19:38 I do wish he could see my side of this. I do not wish a child was not born, but I wish she hadn’t been Edward’s. Jan 16 20:19:49 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:20:42 I have recently learned that two things can be true at once... he regrets laying with Alice, and getting her pregnant... just as he loves his daughter and is glad she is here Jan 16 20:21:25 * Mina nods Jan 16 20:21:40 I am glad he will admit the former to you Jan 16 20:22:32 He will to you... he was of the belief that the latter meant the former could not be true... -he- learned that two things could be true at once after I did Jan 16 20:22:47 * Mina nods Jan 16 20:23:01 It -is- a little easier that way. Jan 16 20:23:07 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:24:16 I think that changes things quite a lot... it moves him wanting to spend time with Florrie away from the idea that he wants Alice around, or that he is pleased with how Florrie came about Jan 16 20:24:41 * Mina nods, saying nothing Jan 16 20:25:15 It is still difficult, though, I know. You were concerned, perhaps, that their being in proximity might spark old attractions? Jan 16 20:25:51 Do you find that unreasonable? Jan 16 20:27:22 Good lord no... I'll be honest rather than truthful... I was a little worried that might be the case Jan 16 20:29:17 * Mina nods slightly, again saying nothing Jan 16 20:30:07 I would appreciate it if you didn't tell Edward this... but I paid -very- close attention to them Jan 16 20:30:19 * Mina nods Jan 16 20:30:31 It does not surprise me Jan 16 20:30:42 No? Jan 16 20:30:56 You like to know everything Jan 16 20:31:12 * Morgan nods, looking hurt Jan 16 20:32:16 I understand it. The more you know, the less anyone can hurt you or take you off guard. It is a way of protecting yourself and others Jan 16 20:32:25 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:32:51 Not knowing cost me my family, and given what I did in the war, it makes it all the more grievous a failing Jan 16 20:33:16 I will not do your intelligence the disservice of platitudes Jan 16 20:34:03 * Morgan sips his drink Jan 16 20:35:11 I will say though, I was closer to Edward then than almost anyone, and I had not the slightest inkling he would go so far Jan 16 20:35:21 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:36:02 He was... trapped. He could see no other way out. I understand why it happened. Jan 16 20:36:55 * Mina nods “Indeed” Jan 16 20:37:15 * Morgan sighs briefly Jan 16 20:38:10 I was worried at first... they got along well but... he gets along with every woman he's ever met, barring Claudia. Its become apparent that, while they might like eachother, there is no real attraction there anymore Jan 16 20:39:22 While I appreciate the reassurance, he tells me many of the women he was indelicate with he was not particularly attracted to at all. Jan 16 20:40:13 Yes... because he was stupid and should have asked more probingly if you were truly okay with it, and you were stupid because you didn't tell him how you -really- felt about it. Jan 16 20:42:48 * Mina frowns “What choice did I have, Morgan? I loved him. Whilst he was kept from me by circumstance, what could I do? I did not want to lose him, and I thought I could bury my head in the sand and it would be as if he had never been unfaithful to me at all. I was only nineteen. Now, at nearly twenty five, I would tell him he could go and... go and... go fuck himself.” Jan 16 20:43:34 * Morgan looks surprised Jan 16 20:44:03 * Mina blushes a little “I apologise for my language.” Jan 16 20:44:13 Don't you dare, not for a second. Jan 16 20:44:38 * Mina looks at him a moment, leaving the courtly facade to one side Jan 16 20:46:12 That’s what I should have done, isn’t it? not fallen for nonsense about a man’s needs and how his friends were behaving. I should have told him to stop being a disgrace to his family and learnt how to manage his baser instincts like a man, not a randy teenager with an uncontrollable cockstand! Jan 16 20:46:31 * Morgan nods Jan 16 20:47:29 Yes... thats what you should have done. Given the influence some people had over him, its not -entirely- his own doing but... mostly. Jan 16 20:47:40 * Mina watches the fire a moment before she says “I am really, very, -very- cross with my husband.” Jan 16 20:48:37 Good Jan 16 20:48:51 * Mina looks at him Jan 16 20:50:27 He went from my Father’s house after being banished, thinking he had supposedly lost me forever, and within a fortnight he is fucking another woman because she supposedly looks a little like me?! That is the most ridiculous, childish, idiotic horseshit I have ever heard! Jan 16 20:51:03 * Morgan shrugs, sipping his chocolate Jan 16 20:51:29 why is he like that?! You are not like that? Jan 16 20:51:34 ?!* Jan 16 20:51:53 Because he was corrupted by Karsten while I was not Jan 16 20:52:42 That is not good enough. He was old enough to know better. Now we all suffer the consequences. Jan 16 20:54:25 You think it so simple? He betrayed his family, took the lives of his sister in law and niece, damn near got beaten to death, all after trying to rein in the damage I had caused, then when he turned to your father, had you taken from him as well... I think you underestimate the weight of all that Jan 16 20:55:52 He was no saint before the fire, and you know that as well as I. She is not the only other woman, she is just the only one that none of us can avoid acknowledging Jan 16 20:56:37 No... that is true. Jan 16 20:58:02 Until there was a child, it could have been left in the past, just an awful and painful time that we tried to move on from. Now the wound is opened and will continue to be so. Jan 16 20:58:42 * Morgan watches her for a moment before shrugging Jan 16 20:59:05 * Mina watches him back Jan 16 20:59:37 I sense you do not wish to have this level of open discourse now we have begun Jan 16 21:00:44 * Morgan smiles a little Jan 16 21:01:19 You sense incorrectly. What I don't wish for is the impact an inconsidered reply on my part may have Jan 16 21:01:34 * Mina nods Jan 16 21:03:00 I am angry with Edward. He wants me to let him lead me through this situation. But how do you trust someone to lead you when they have shown time and again that they cannot even lead -themselves-? Jan 16 21:03:37 Do you think me the same man I was back then? Jan 16 21:04:00 * Mina takes a moment to consider this Jan 16 21:04:06 Partly, yes Jan 16 21:04:10 Which part? Jan 16 21:05:06 That you are ruled by your heart. You are not coldly political and the noble life still feels like a poorly fitted pair of breeches Jan 16 21:05:29 * Morgan nods Jan 16 21:06:00 But I am playing the political game... and the noble one, you just haven't seen me do it yet. But the rest of me, that has changed... Jan 16 21:07:19 Has it? Can you honestly say that if you had to make a choice between this life and your responsibilities, and having Molly but giving everything noble and political up, that you would not be gone in a heartbeat? Jan 16 21:09:12 Yes. I've seen what inept and cruel leadership can bring to a place... my -duty- is to make the Grafdom a better place to live, to make it secure and profitable for all. Jan 16 21:09:32 * Mina watches him Jan 16 21:09:44 You would now pick duty over love? Jan 16 21:10:46 I don't have to. And neither do you. Jan 16 21:11:26 No, that’s not how it works. You made the point that you are not the same man... Jan 16 21:12:11 * Morgan sips his chocolate Jan 16 21:12:39 Your answer will not leave this room, but you have piqued my interest Jan 16 21:14:09 * Morgan puts his cup down, pushing it away Jan 16 21:15:33 Alright... I have lived a life doing nothing but duty, without love. Whats the fucking -point- of it all if we are not to love? Even the damn bible says its what we're here for... Jan 16 21:15:53 * Mina nods Jan 16 21:16:05 I value your honesty Jan 16 21:16:18 * Morgan watches her Jan 16 21:16:25 Do you? Jan 16 21:17:37 Yes. I might not like what you -say- but I value that you tell me the truth Jan 16 21:17:58 I do not lie... but honesty and truthfulness are not the same Jan 16 21:18:04 why? Jan 16 21:19:24 Because I tell the truth when I say that Edward does not hold all the responsibility... I am -honest- when I say that you are clinging to hurt that you are half responsible for fucking causing, and you are ruining your marriage with it. Jan 16 21:19:44 * Mina ‘s brows raise Jan 16 21:20:10 I see your views are strong on this Jan 16 21:20:51 Like I said earlier... he was an idiot for just accepting your answer and behaving like one of his friends, you were an idiot for agreeing and then keeping quiet about it. Jan 16 21:21:45 * Mina sips her hot chocolate extremely calmly Jan 16 21:23:39 * Morgan watches her, waiting Jan 16 21:24:13 I appreciate you feeling you can tell me that Jan 16 21:24:32 * Morgan shrugs Jan 16 21:24:51 I love you and, ultimately, I am to blame Jan 16 21:26:29 I also do not want to say something in haste I may later regret Jan 16 21:26:47 I know you blame me. I have done since Graben. Its alright. Jan 16 21:26:56 Is it? Jan 16 21:27:40 Do I like it? Absolutely not. It tears at my soul, the damage my actions caused, particularly now I understand it all Jan 16 21:28:00 * Mina nods very solemnly Jan 16 21:28:12 I am sorry that you are still so pained Jan 16 21:28:47 Why should I not be? Its deserved. Jan 16 21:30:30 The situation was of your making, but one cannot always blame the castle builder for putting it on a hill when the people who choose to sled down the snowy driveway hit trees. Jan 16 21:31:17 An interesting turn of phrase Jan 16 21:32:46 * Mina smiles slightly, sipping her chocolate Jan 16 21:32:48 yes Jan 16 21:33:23 This is not how I wanted this to go Jan 16 21:33:34 How did you want this to go? Jan 16 21:34:30 I wanted to talk things through with you, tell you some things that are important... not have broken things even further Jan 16 21:35:11 We’ve been frank with each other, but I still care for you, Morgan Jan 16 21:35:31 How could you when I've cost you, cost us all so much? Jan 16 21:35:55 Because you were an idiot too. Jan 16 21:36:27 It can't go on like this, Mina... its killing him, its killing you Jan 16 21:37:41 I will take your suggestions for how to resolve this, because I have done what I was asked. I am here to meet his child and her mother, as has been asked of me. Jan 16 21:38:25 I... want to tell you something... and, if it gets out, I'm a dead man. And thats not even a slight exaggeration. Jan 16 21:38:33 * Mina nods Jan 16 21:39:30 I will tell you something that could be used against me too, if that will make you feel more at ease Jan 16 21:39:56 That is not necessary, unless you really wish to. Jan 16 21:40:31 I wish you to understand that I am angry at the situation we are now in, not at you Jan 16 21:40:58 Not that I'd blame you... but... alright... Jan 16 21:41:12 You cannot tell Edward. Jan 16 21:41:39 * Morgan watches her Jan 16 21:41:42 Alright Jan 16 21:42:12 I considered having sex with another man so that he would be able to feel the pain and betrayal I feel. Jan 16 21:42:40 * Morgan nods Jan 16 21:42:41 When? Jan 16 21:42:48 Very recently Jan 16 21:42:57 * Morgan holds out his hand Jan 16 21:43:04 * Mina takes it Jan 16 21:43:13 That is not the sort of person you are Jan 16 21:43:33 No, it is not Jan 16 21:44:01 For the love of god tell me it wasn't Potts Jan 16 21:44:32 I cannot tell you that. Jan 16 21:45:01 Not without lying? Jan 16 21:45:06 Precisely Jan 16 21:45:50 * Morgan nods Jan 16 21:46:41 * Mina smiles slightly, watching his face “I’d have preferred Zench but I am not fun enough in the bedroom to appeal to him” Jan 16 21:47:08 * Morgan raises an eyebrow Jan 16 21:47:10 Not what I hear Jan 16 21:47:19 * Mina blushes hard then Jan 16 21:47:47 I dread to think Jan 16 21:48:31 I think he does have an idea of that feeling... not to the same extent, perhaps... Jan 16 21:49:17 I have -never- strayed. I was faithful to him all those years. Jan 16 21:50:15 I wasn't suggesting that love... he has had dreams, where he is betrayed... it pales, I know, but the feeling is there all the same. He strives to protect you from seeing the torment he puts himself through over all of it... Jan 16 21:50:39 * Mina nods slightly Jan 16 21:55:19 I do not know how to forgive it. His enthusiasm for his daughter feels like a slap in the face each time. It feels like he feels it all worthwhile because he got a child he loves from it, and that my pain is something I must just carry because I am not as important in his life as I once was Jan 16 21:55:39 * Morgan shakes his head Jan 16 21:57:02 You are wrong. He loves her, absolutely he does, but you are as important. You are his wife, mother to his heirs, a love he has yearned for and still does. Jan 16 21:57:21 * Mina looks back to the fire Jan 16 21:57:31 I am not the mother to his heirs. Jan 16 21:57:59 Look at me, please... We have reached the point I must tell you what could get me killed and I would rather you see I am sincere Jan 16 21:58:20 * Mina looks to him Jan 16 21:58:36 Do you trust that I will not lie? That what I say will be the truth? Jan 16 21:58:40 Yes Jan 16 21:59:14 I have certain... talents... one of which gives me insight into the future Jan 16 21:59:22 * Morgan watches her reaction Jan 16 22:00:24 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:00:51 Molly has mentioned that you sometimes have dreams that predict the future Jan 16 22:00:57 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:01:18 I have seen a part of yours. I know when your first child is born. Jan 16 22:01:46 * Mina looks briefly surprised Jan 16 22:02:01 how do you know it is not just a dream? Jan 16 22:02:36 That is... hard to answer. But I know it. Jan 16 22:03:52 Are you certain you are right? Jan 16 22:04:00 Completely Jan 16 22:04:11 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:04:14 when? Jan 16 22:04:57 Now... I don't think its a good idea to tell you exactly when... but I will tell you a time you will know you are pregnant before... Jan 16 22:05:16 why isn’t it a good idea? Jan 16 22:06:26 I think that trying to conceive knowing it -will- happen, but not -when- will aid your marriage... whereas knowing when, well, you could both look at it as a 'whats the point this time, lets skip it' and I think that intimacy is important for both of you Jan 16 22:08:42 * Mina blushes a little when she says “We would not skip it either way” Jan 16 22:09:07 Lets... take out the opportunity to... or worse, it becomes clinical... Jan 16 22:11:01 * Mina nods slightly “yes” Jan 16 22:11:22 * Morgan nods, picking up his chocolate with his free hand, sipping it Jan 16 22:12:39 That gives you some hope? Jan 16 22:13:37 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:13:53 yes, but you haven’t told me when Jan 16 22:14:06 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:14:10 You will know by my birthday Jan 16 22:14:23 this year? Jan 16 22:14:29 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:14:50 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:15:43 That is a little while away, but it will give us time to go through more healing Jan 16 22:16:26 Think of that as a... latest date... Jan 16 22:17:47 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:18:01 Are we to have a boy? Jan 16 22:18:17 I don't know. I haven't seen -that- far ahead Jan 16 22:19:48 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:19:54 Does Edward know? Jan 16 22:19:59 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:20:17 He does. Jan 16 22:21:36 * Mina nods, smiling slightly Jan 16 22:21:45 thank you, that is good to know Jan 16 22:22:06 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:22:33 Its not the totality of my... talents, but... it'll do for now Jan 16 22:24:31 * Mina nods. Sadly there’s no one to chime in a That’s What She Said as usual. Jan 16 22:24:55 There's a couple more things... and I don't think these will be easy Jan 16 22:25:01 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:25:06 please, continue Jan 16 22:26:02 Tomorrow morning... I think you should meet Florrie. I'm going to have some fruit ready, and the three of us will go for a little walk so you can get to know her a little Jan 16 22:26:13 I can’t walk tomorrow Jan 16 22:26:24 Its your course, your legs haven' fallen off Jan 16 22:26:56 It is the time to rest our bodies and be careful with ourselves Jan 16 22:27:18 Do you think farmers wives do that? Or do they continue working in the fields? Do they expire from it? Jan 16 22:28:08 I do not know... As a gentleman, I can only imagine you know as little about the process as Edward does Jan 16 22:29:00 My dear sister, Molly and I are quite open about things... and Uinise tells me a great deal, whether I was ready for it or not. Jan 16 22:29:26 * Mina looks a little awkward Jan 16 22:29:58 walking would be uncomfortable and unpleasant. Jan 16 22:30:24 The alternative is I will bring her to you, and we will play together... probably... tea parties... Jan 16 22:31:15 That I will do. I wish men were visited monthly with the loosest of bowels for a week so they could truly appreciate the misery. Jan 16 22:31:45 Anyone who has eaten my fathers cooking knows precisely what that is like Jan 16 22:31:55 * Mina laughs Jan 16 22:32:06 Your Father haas ever cooked?! Jan 16 22:32:16 We were camping, it was over a fire... Jan 16 22:32:37 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:32:48 I will see her Jan 16 22:32:55 With an open mind Jan 16 22:33:06 I will endeavour to Jan 16 22:33:16 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:33:31 She's very shy... she'll probably need some gentle coaxing to bring her out of her shell Jan 16 22:33:43 * Mina frowns slightly Jan 16 22:33:59 I am not good at children, I have not been around them Jan 16 22:34:19 I know you haven't. I'll help you. Jan 16 22:34:27 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:34:29 thank you Jan 16 22:35:16 Its kind of like talking to HeinzHarold... doesn't matter if he's saying the daftest crap you've ever heard, you have to pretend you're fascinated and want to hear more Jan 16 22:35:29 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:35:38 That is how one survives Court Jan 16 22:35:43 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:35:52 So I'm told. Jan 16 22:36:34 But if it eases you, it means they are pretending to be interested in your daftest crap also Jan 16 22:36:53 * Morgan shrugs Jan 16 22:37:06 I'm pretty good at letting them talk... most of them want to talk about themselves anyway Jan 16 22:38:23 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:38:31 They do Jan 16 22:38:57 * Morgan nods, sipping his chocolate Jan 16 22:39:28 The last thing... this, I'm afraid, will be painful... Jan 16 22:39:47 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:40:02 yes? Jan 16 22:40:15 * Morgan puts the cup down Jan 16 22:40:25 Molly is with child Jan 16 22:41:19 * Mina does look very pained indeed, like she has been punched in the gut, but the courtly facade immediately comes up like a shield, and she smiles Jan 16 22:41:42 Congratulations, Morgan, I hope everything goes well Jan 16 22:41:53 * Morgan squeezes her hand, looking at her sadly Jan 16 22:42:13 Its alright, you don't have to pretend Jan 16 22:42:32 Please, let me have my dignity. Jan 16 22:42:56 * Morgan kisses her knuckles gently Jan 16 22:43:33 I hope before long you can be pleased for us, but know this... I do not blame you for not being right now. Your time isn't far away Jan 16 22:43:57 As you said, two things can be true at once. Jan 16 22:44:11 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:45:12 We have told only Edward, HeinzHarold and Inga and now you. They were under instructions not to tell you. I didn't want you finding out without knowing hope Jan 16 22:45:28 Thank you, I appreciate your kindness Jan 16 22:47:24 I think... despite the feelings it brought up... I really liked coarse Mina... Jan 16 22:47:36 * Mina smiles slightly Jan 16 22:47:54 You can blame Edward, in certain situations he encourages it. Jan 16 22:48:07 * Morgan nods Jan 16 22:48:38 There is a rawness that... I don't think you can have with someone you're not at least trying to forgive Jan 16 22:49:00 * Mina nods Jan 16 22:49:46 I’d like to retire, would you walk me up? Jan 16 22:49:53 Of course Jan 16 22:50:24 * Mina stands, tucking the bottle under arm Jan 16 22:50:48 * Morgan stands up, moving to the door before offering his arm Jan 16 22:51:06 * Mina takes it Jan 16 22:51:42 * Morgan shows her out, concentrating to damp the fire as the doors closing before walking her toward her room Jan 16 22:52:05 *She thanks him when they get there* Jan 16 22:52:40 I don't know if Edwards in here... I sent word to find Molly if he needed company, but I'll find him and send him up if not Jan 16 22:53:05 I do not mind some solitude, thank you Jan 16 22:54:12 * Morgan nods, letting go of her arm Jan 16 22:54:22 I love you very much, sister-mine Jan 16 22:54:43 * Mina smiles “I love you also. Goodnight, Morgan” Jan 16 22:54:52 * Morgan inclines his head, letting her go Jan 16 23:14:06 * Mina has quit (Read error: EOF from client) Jan 16 23:55:17 * Morgan has quit (Quit: This computer has gone to sleep)