**** BEGIN LOGGING AT Sat Dec 17 16:33:39 2022 Dec 17 16:33:39 * Morgan (~mads@iMac-2.lan) has joined Dec 17 19:40:40 * MollyK (~igloo@CrystabllesiPad.lan) has joined Dec 17 19:42:16 V: Boys don't have to learn lessons?! *he looks excited* Dec 17 19:42:16 Don't get any ideas... Dec 17 19:42:16 V: *he sighs* I don't like schooling Dec 17 19:42:16 * Xsarlac nods "most boys don't" Dec 17 19:42:16 * Morgan nods, sipping his coffee Dec 17 19:42:19 We don't make them. There's more things suited to them that classrooms Dec 17 19:42:21 *Varick comes to sit on Morgan's knee* Dec 17 19:42:23 * Morgan cuddles him close Dec 17 19:42:25 V: what do boys do instead? Dec 17 19:42:27 * Xsarlac smiles Dec 17 19:42:29 Spear Hunting, fishing, rock climbing, swimming, building houses, carpentry, playing outdoors Dec 17 19:44:27 V: That sounds fun, Papa! I want to do that not learning Dec 17 19:45:59 Not an option Varick... we've got to learn the things we need when we're grown... though, I'm going to get HeinzHarold to show you how to work a forge, make things... maybe he'll let you help build his cottage Dec 17 19:47:43 * MollyK is now known as Varick Dec 17 19:47:55 * Varick sighs "okay" Dec 17 19:49:02 * Morgan nods Dec 17 19:49:09 Its not so bad Dec 17 19:50:00 * Varick nods Dec 17 19:50:44 But I would still rather just play Dec 17 19:51:00 I know... we'll make sure we get time for that too Dec 17 19:53:29 Okay Papa. Can I go for my nap now? Dec 17 19:53:38 * Morgan nods Dec 17 19:53:39 Of course Dec 17 19:54:22 * Varick gets up, taking himself off. HH stretches "looks like quiet time already" Dec 17 19:54:46 * Morgan nods, watching in the direction Varick has just gone Dec 17 19:54:47 Aye Dec 17 19:56:42 *the others gather their things, eventually leaving him and Molly alone* Dec 17 19:56:49 * Varick is now known as Molly Dec 17 19:58:24 * Molly pours more coffee Dec 17 19:58:35 Is everything alright? Dec 17 19:58:48 * Morgan nods Dec 17 19:58:57 Aye... first time Varicks taken himself off for a nap Dec 17 19:59:19 He's growing up Dec 17 20:00:10 * Morgan nods slowly before shaking himself Dec 17 20:01:22 Claudia has suggested she may be of use in preparing you for dealing with the Capperlucians... Dec 17 20:02:56 Why so? Dec 17 20:04:38 Because... you're already good at driving a bargain, you've got a keen mind for trade... but you need confidence in dealing with people, particularly those who think they have some divine right to be above others Dec 17 20:05:50 * Molly nods Dec 17 20:05:58 That would be helpful Dec 17 20:08:07 * Morgan nods Dec 17 20:08:10 I think so, yes Dec 17 20:09:11 I'll do that if you wish *she puts his coffee beside him* Dec 17 20:09:30 I think it'd be a good idea Dec 17 20:10:21 * Molly nods, kissing his forehead Dec 17 20:10:32 You wished to talk? Dec 17 20:11:44 Ah... the dream... Dec 17 20:12:50 Shall I sit on your lap, or will we move to the couch? Dec 17 20:13:08 Up to you love Dec 17 20:14:00 * Molly carefully sits in his lap Dec 17 20:14:11 Here will be comfortable enough Dec 17 20:15:06 * Morgan nods, sipping his coffee Dec 17 20:16:54 Alright then... *he takes a breath* Three days out from getting married to a very pregnant Molly Rosenkrantz... Dec 17 20:18:56 * Molly smiles "mmhmm" Dec 17 20:19:04 * Morgan frowns Dec 17 20:19:32 Took her down to the seamstress... as I'm leaving I bumped into her assistant... Dec 17 20:19:54 * Molly just looks perplexed "Alright?" Dec 17 20:20:11 Dietlinde... Dec 17 20:21:04 * Molly nods Dec 17 20:21:28 Yes, my love? Dec 17 20:21:41 * Morgan frowns harder Dec 17 20:22:30 Felt like my heart dropped... same as when I -actually- saw her... even sat on the shore of the Sudlache, I couldn't stop thinking about her... I don't like what it says about the sort of man I am... was... would be... Dec 17 20:23:04 * Molly nods a little Dec 17 20:23:11 I see Dec 17 20:24:28 * Morgan looks sad Dec 17 20:25:19 It hasn't happened. That is not where we are. Dec 17 20:25:51 No... even so... Dec 17 20:26:10 * Molly nods Dec 17 20:26:11 Yes Dec 17 20:27:05 * Morgan sighs Dec 17 20:27:11 You are... angry... Dec 17 20:27:25 No... I'm not angry Dec 17 20:27:54 But... Dec 17 20:28:48 * Molly shrugs "there's no point in feeling anything about it. It isn't our life, and it cannot happen now" Dec 17 21:07:50 Seems like you're feeling something about t Dec 17 21:08:35 It doesn't matter, my love. You've not -done- anything Dec 17 21:09:01 * Morgan scowls Dec 17 21:10:03 I thought myself better than that Dec 17 21:10:44 You wouldn't have been able to control it, just like in reality Dec 17 21:11:39 * Morgan nods, scowling hard Dec 17 21:12:19 * Molly sighs Dec 17 21:12:29 I don't know what I can say, my love Dec 17 21:12:34 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 21:12:40 I don't know Dec 17 21:13:29 * Molly nods "it's... it's not the easiest of things, is it?" Dec 17 21:14:08 No. Its really not. Dec 17 21:15:39 * Molly tucks her head against his neck, her arm around his waist Dec 17 21:16:43 Would you prefer I do not tell you in future? Dec 17 21:17:17 No... you need solace, and I would never deny you that Dec 17 21:18:27 I hate upsetting you like this Dec 17 21:20:17 It's hard to hear, that's all. But it wasn't intentional in the dream, it was just... *she shrugs a little* Dec 17 21:21:24 * Morgan sighs heavily Dec 17 21:23:09 This isn't helping either of us right now Dec 17 21:24:15 * Molly nods "do you need time alone? Has it made you wish to pull away from me, or notice more how you did not feel that with me?" Dec 17 21:25:33 No... no love, its ust... I don't think this is helping, so we may as well do something productive Dec 17 21:26:34 * Molly sighs "I suppose so. For me, being close helps, but I think it is different for you?" Dec 17 21:26:53 * Morgan nods Dec 17 21:27:19 Its hard to explain... it just.. its like I can't deal with it until I've dealt with it already Dec 17 21:27:42 * Molly stands up Dec 17 21:28:09 I'll let you on your way. I have a few things I could get on with Dec 17 21:28:35 * Morgan pulls her back into his lap Dec 17 21:28:50 No... no stay here Dec 17 21:29:19 This isn't productive as you wished Dec 17 21:29:33 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 21:29:50 I had hoped it would be, but I'm not surprised. Its not how I deal with things Dec 17 21:30:20 I haven't reacted as you needed. I'm sorry. Dec 17 21:30:48 You've reacted as you feel and there is nothing to apologise about that Dec 17 21:33:07 Of course there is, my love. I have always sought to give you what you need Dec 17 21:33:21 What I need is honesty Dec 17 21:34:44 Is it? Dec 17 21:35:27 * Morgan nods Dec 17 21:35:28 Usually Dec 17 21:36:46 It hurts. I am sorry, but it does. But that doesn't mean I don't love you, and it doesn't mean you should have kept it to yourself Dec 17 21:37:28 * Morgan nods Dec 17 21:37:30 I'm sorry Dec 17 21:37:55 I'm sorry you had to dream and feel that Dec 17 21:38:51 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 21:39:03 Its... what I'm destined to endure Dec 17 21:39:57 I wish I could fix this Dec 17 21:40:07 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 21:40:10 It is what it is Dec 17 21:41:35 * Molly nods "All these paths, and so few end happily it seems" Dec 17 21:42:06 * Morgan nods slowly Dec 17 21:44:53 I suppose... I shouldn't be surprised, given what I did... Dec 17 21:45:05 What? Dec 17 21:46:29 Betraying HeinzHarold like that... its no surprise I can't be trusted Dec 17 21:47:00 But you didn't act on it Dec 17 21:47:24 I'm not sure that'll last Dec 17 21:49:33 I suppose if you could have given up your family and your birthright for her, it wouldn't be a stretch that you would be willing to do that again? Dec 17 21:50:26 No, I suppose bit Dec 17 21:50:31 not* Dec 17 21:51:14 Liebes herz, would you do something for me? Dec 17 21:51:40 What? Dec 17 21:52:32 Would you put that rope on my arm again? Dec 17 21:53:05 * Morgan nods, fishing it out from his pocket Dec 17 21:53:08 Arm please Dec 17 21:54:20 * Molly pushes up her sleeve to bare her forearm Dec 17 21:56:01 * Morgan closes his eyes for a moment before tying the rope up from her wrist Dec 17 21:56:33 * Molly watches the ropework take shape Dec 17 21:58:59 * Morgan ties it off before nodding at it Dec 17 21:59:06 That's beautiful, my love Dec 17 22:00:07 Not bad Dec 17 22:00:31 * Molly nods "thank you" Dec 17 22:00:48 * Morgan nods, laying his head against her Dec 17 22:02:37 * Molly fidgets to bring her temple against him, speaking quietly "I love you, so much" Dec 17 22:02:47 And I you, my love Dec 17 22:04:20 I wish this was all so much easier Dec 17 22:04:25 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:04:27 As do I Dec 17 22:05:18 It doesn't feel fair, does it? Dec 17 22:05:38 Not really, no... Dec 17 22:06:28 We have to save the world, and we can't even have this easily without pain Dec 17 22:07:11 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:08:12 If it wasn't for the occasions when the dreams are useful... I'd be screaming at the Nieblungen to do something Dec 17 22:09:16 Sometimes I wonder if it's the forces trying to keep us apart. These things, it's like they are to drive a wedge between us, to make it seem like we aren't supposed to be together Dec 17 22:09:52 The thought has occurred in the past Dec 17 22:10:51 * Molly nods, sighing Dec 17 22:11:02 I worry that one day it will work Dec 17 22:11:15 * Morgan shakes his head Dec 17 22:11:18 Never getting rid of me Dec 17 22:13:02 Unless you fall out of love with me. Unless I do something in a dream that is intolerable. Unless the feelings you had before are so intense and lingering when you wake that it is no longer me you want Dec 17 22:13:32 * Morgan shakes his head Dec 17 22:13:35 Simply not possible Dec 17 22:14:22 I hope not Dec 17 22:15:13 I am confident of it Dec 17 22:15:49 * Molly nods, kissing him gently Dec 17 22:17:34 I want you to want to be here, and to be glad that you found me. I am sorry that it wasn't on the cards for us to have a beautiful beginning like that. Dec 17 22:19:01 What matters is what we make of the start we have had Dec 17 22:20:34 * Molly nods "I suppose most people don't fall in love at first sight... it just seems very common for those around us" Dec 17 22:21:04 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:21:20 Aye, I suppose so Dec 17 22:22:21 * Molly nods "was there anything else you need to tell me about this dream?" Dec 17 22:23:04 I don't think so, no... seemed that Sebastien and HeinzHarold were both rather interested in Dietlinde, so they'd probably fall out again Dec 17 22:24:15 Oh dear! Dec 17 22:26:03 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:26:04 Quite Dec 17 22:27:04 We've seen paths where Heinzharold marries her, that is possibly how it will go instead of you being unfaithful? Dec 17 22:27:55 Maybe. I hope so. Dec 17 22:29:39 * Molly nods Dec 17 22:29:54 As do I Dec 17 22:31:18 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:31:34 Do you wish me to keep it to myself if I prove myself untrustworthy in that dream? Dec 17 22:33:03 I... I don't know... I wouldn't want you bearing it alone, but knowing that even a commitment to me, even me carrying your child, would not be enough to make you able to resist... I don't know. Dec 17 22:37:37 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:37:39 Alright Dec 17 22:37:55 Do you think that is silly? Dec 17 22:38:24 Not at all Dec 17 22:40:31 * Molly brings her forehead to his "Can I let you know when I have thought about it with some more objectivity?" Dec 17 22:41:03 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:41:05 If you need to Dec 17 22:41:36 * Molly nods Dec 17 22:42:02 I'm ashamed to admit it, but I feel a little jealous, and I hate that. Dec 17 22:42:58 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:43:02 Its understandable I think Dec 17 22:43:38 I know, but it is something I have always prided myself on not feeling Dec 17 22:44:19 * Morgan nods Dec 17 22:44:27 Even so... Dec 17 22:44:59 This is different? Dec 17 22:45:26 At the very least it is for you Dec 17 22:50:55 What do you mean? Dec 17 22:52:11 I've been dealing with being the sort of person who would betray his best friend for... weeks... this is the first time you've had to deal with the idea that I'd do that to you Dec 17 22:53:09 * Molly nods Dec 17 22:53:57 Though I did dream you had been unfaithful frequently with Hildegarde... and that you kissed Claudia! Dec 17 22:54:29 Thats just... wandering into the realm of the insane Dec 17 22:55:35 * Molly nods Dec 17 22:57:12 It's... I think it's that you were with me, must have at least been somewhat attracted to me, I was having your baby, and it still wasn't enough. That -I- wasn't enough Dec 17 22:59:00 But it isn't you... Dec 17 22:59:14 No... it's silly, as I said Dec 17 22:59:53 Not at all Dec 17 23:00:46 * Molly nods, kissing him gently again "thank you" Dec 17 23:01:07 Whatever for? Dec 17 23:02:20 Being kind with my heart when I am heartsore Dec 17 23:02:43 * Morgan shrugs, kissing her knuckles Dec 17 23:04:50 You are too good for me, my love Dec 17 23:05:09 No, I'm really not Dec 17 23:05:56 You are. You are so gentle Dec 17 23:06:17 Almost ironic, given the person I was in Avalon Dec 17 23:06:38 * Molly nods Dec 17 23:07:28 But aside from the first little while, when you were scolding me for liking Horatio and gossiping, you were always gentler with me than others Dec 17 23:08:45 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 23:08:49 maybe Dec 17 23:09:19 * Molly nods Dec 17 23:09:41 Maybe I brought out a gentleness? Dec 17 23:10:11 I imagine so... certainly no-one else experienced it Dec 17 23:11:21 * Molly nods Dec 17 23:11:46 You were very gentle when you first kissed me. That's a very happy memory Dec 17 23:12:00 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:12:05 I was... nervous Dec 17 23:13:39 * Molly smiles "you mentioned that before, though it confuses me still" Dec 17 23:14:24 It meant being vulnerable Dec 17 23:15:28 Because I might have rejected it? Dec 17 23:15:33 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:16:57 * Molly smiles Dec 17 23:17:15 I cannot begin to tell you how absolutely implausible that was Dec 17 23:18:24 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 23:18:25 Even so Dec 17 23:19:26 * Molly nods Dec 17 23:19:52 That was one of the very best nights of my life Dec 17 23:21:02 Really? Dec 17 23:21:17 * Molly nods Dec 17 23:21:53 You don't know how much I wanted that, how much I'd daydreamed of kissing you... Dec 17 23:22:18 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:23:53 * Molly blushes Dec 17 23:23:59 Sorry, I am saying too much Dec 17 23:24:05 No love, you aren't Dec 17 23:24:17 I did think you knew Dec 17 23:25:11 No, not really... it was something of a surprise Dec 17 23:26:35 * Molly smiles Dec 17 23:26:57 I am adept at hiding my feelings, or I used to be Dec 17 23:27:09 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:27:19 I'm gladdened that you don't feel you need to any longer Dec 17 23:29:25 I am trying very hard not to. This conversation has rather pushed me far out of my comfort zone, and usually I would have put myself at a distance from it long ago Dec 17 23:29:49 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:29:54 I'm sorry, I'll let you be Dec 17 23:30:48 * Molly shakes her head, smiling Dec 17 23:31:07 As I am in your lap, you wouldn't be able to even if you wanted to Dec 17 23:31:39 I don't like making you uncomfortable... and, just as a matter of fact... I'm plenty strong enough to move you if needs be Dec 17 23:32:17 Move me, maybe. You could stand up, but you couldn't get me off Dec 17 23:32:39 * Morgan looks confused Dec 17 23:33:26 You couldn't remove me from you. I would cling on to you Dec 17 23:34:04 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:34:06 good Dec 17 23:34:35 I mean physically. I do not think you're really that strong... Dec 17 23:35:17 I think you'd be surprised Dec 17 23:36:04 * Molly shrugs, smiling "oh, I don't think you can, mon petit chou. I have a firm grip" Dec 17 23:36:14 * Morgan shrugs Dec 17 23:37:01 You could try, I suppose, if you wish to prove me wrong Dec 17 23:37:37 I have no desire to Dec 17 23:37:55 No? What do you desire? Dec 17 23:38:58 I am content where I am right this moment... even if we should be getting help to get you prepared for trade negotiations Dec 17 23:40:18 Perhaps it is a lesson in knowing where I belong, where I am safe even when I am not feeling very happy with complicated discussions? Dec 17 23:41:19 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:41:24 perhaps Dec 17 23:41:35 Then we are working Dec 17 23:41:57 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:42:41 * Molly kisses him, then puts her head on his shoulder Dec 17 23:43:01 Maybe we can just be quietly here a while. Just us, peaceful Dec 17 23:43:25 * Morgan nods Dec 17 23:43:28 Alright love Dec 17 23:44:25 * Molly stays quiet then, keeping a firm arm around him, the very gentle movement of the ship soothing Dec 17 23:55:44 * Morgan has quit (Quit: This computer has gone to sleep)